As a narcissist I had alot of problems with the enemy inside. The two selfs one good one bad locked in constant war. But, thanks to the ability to fight given by God I overgrown the concept of a opposing side a war if you will. Here's my explanation of how I did it to help anyone who needs to grow beyond it aswell. I would like to start by saying most people or atleast me THINK we have two selfs one who wants to move forward and the one who resists. In society we see so many people wanting to move forward but the opposing self shows up as resistance. You can also picture the two opposing sides as good vs bad if that will help. Often times people are left burnout, weak, tired, and feeling overcome when battling with the opposing self. They feel like it's just to strong. But, what if I told you that the opposing self was not a worthy opponent. That it's not even a second you. It's just a wound. That you can withdraw legitimacy from it. What I mean is think of the opposing self as not a self at all but a wound acting like a seperate mind. It is not a second identity. But just the effects of the war you been through. What if I told you you don't have to feel the effects of the war anymore and move unimpeded by opposing forces. You just have to stop viewing the wound or opposing self as a worthy opponent. We or atleast me give so much attention to this opposing self that's what feeds it. The obstacle only lives if we give it attention. You don't fight it on the battlefield you walk right past it. You know the wound wants confrontation and battle so it can exhaust you. So what you do it walk right past it like nothing is opposing you. This wound or perceived second self being opposed to your movements is not legitimate and thus not worthy of a battle. You don't ignore it you just acknowledge it as not a threat. Because most people never start moving cause they see the wound / perceived opposing self as a strong opposition that they must war with for there mind and ability to move forward. That's the furthest from the truth. This wound / perceived opposition only has the power you give it. It only has the illusion of power because you feed it that by constantly battling with it and losing. You stop giving it power you can acknowledge it and walk right past it. Saying I hear you but we are not engaging in battle I the true self do not think you are worthy opposition anymore. What can this wound / perceived opposing self really do if you just walk right past it without fighting. Just a way to think if you want to drop the whole the opposing self is to strong war. Though we still will have our excuses I understand but this helps. And, it gets even cooler you can see your true self as the healer and your perceived opposing self as the wound. I know most people hate fighting the wound / perceived opposing self because who wants to feel resistance to who they really are inside them. Most people end up hating the things about them they can't control but you can literally be the healer to your wounds it's quite fun. I know most people learn better when fun is involved so if you ever played a mmo and mained a healer you can think of your true self as the healer and literally heal your wounds. Might be a little childish but that's what worked for me. I know lot's of people have things about them that they can't change and they hate it. Instead of hating it and fighting fire with fire. Instead of saying these wounds should just submit to me I know best you can cast heal on your wounds and give your self compassion. Psychology says to give your wounds compassion and they will show up less often and the pain of the wound will soften over time because your literally softening the wound. Example: Let's say you think something bad instead of hating your self you target lock on that mfer and heal the shit out of that wound lol. Let's say your meeting resistance in your life from the wound / perceived opposing self and can't move forward you don't engage in a battle you target lock and heal the shit out of that mfer. You say things like it's ok to move I'm gonna move and you are not my enemy I will give you a nudge on the shoulder and walk past you your just a wound your just hurting and want to protect me from the same hurt I felt as a child I understand your scared you just trying to protect me but I can protect myself now I can handle hurt now you can rest I'm the adult this wound was created when I was a child rest things are different now. Or whatever speaks to your wounds. Well that's all I wanted to write hope that helps someone.

@gabriel_true @yaasshat Day 42: I went to the ER today because the pain started up again as soon as I woke up. It wasn't appendicitis, they gave me an ultrasound to check my appendix, ovaries, uterus and other organs in my digestive track, and they all looked good. Appendix was just fine and my ovaries weren't twisted and nothing ruptured. But, it's just a very intense constipation due to my digestive track not working properly after not eating for two weeks. The food I've been eating isn't greasy/unhealthy or anything, but the doctors/nurse explained how the organs inside kind of go through a shock when you start to eat again after not doing it in so long, which is what my intestines are doing with the food I've eaten. I can still feel hunger/have an appetite, but due to my body not having to constantly move to digest food recently, it kind of is trying to reprocess how to do it and as it's trying to work that out, it's backing me up badly lol. Anyway, I hope you don't have any digestive issues, Gabby? Cause while I can blame it on the fact I didn't eat for two weeks, this has happened to me before when I was younger too, so I think I just have some digestive issues sometimes. - All Is Well Here: Your Occasionally In Pain Friend