My type is a one-eyed, one-horned, pigeon-toed, undergrowed, flyin' purple people eater who just wants to join a rock and roll band and wear short shorts!

Well, I normally have nightmares but last night it actually was a pretty good dream. Me and a girl were play wrestling on like a picnic table. Like I'd try to hold them down, then they'd flip me and try to do the same, but we'd also keep each other from falling off. We were just like having so much fun, laughing and enjoying ourselves, but in the background I could hear people calling us like, disgusting and rude. Basically acting like we're doing something wrong just be being out in public. Ultimately I'd call it a dream more than a nightmare. But my normal dreams are like, me drowning in darkness or literally getting washed out into the ocean, or stalked. So it was strange to have something different happen.

I'ma say it cause it's low hanging fruit. Feet pics when? Also something about those hands... https://i.ytimg.com/vi/kjR58r4p8wU/maxresdefault.jpg

https://media1.tenor.com/m/gW-eFIxllSsAAAAC/anakin-darth-vader.gif Edit: I didn't look just posted this. I was correct

Sir, did you mean to say, "Eatin' Good in the Neighborhood!" -Applebee's https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2020/07/07/17/30495656-8498853-image-m-106_1594139754254.jpg Cause I sure am hungry right now and would love for someone to take me out... To eat that is. Hehe!

He woke up to the sound of his two alarm clocks. It was fairly early in the morning as the sun was far from up. Slipping from under his well worn sheets saturated with sweat, the man made himself upright. Staring blankly for awhile as his eyes focused he contemplated laying back down for an additional 15 minutes. '15 minutes more couldn't matter that much, right?' he mused internally until speaking aloud, "Dang, if only I didn't need that damn money!" How he kept finding himself with so many bills was beyond his understanding. Surly all of the money spent over the years went towards worthwhile things! Though it wasn't the case in actuality. The guy sucked a budgeting and when it came to spending it didn't take much to beguile cash from holey pockets. However despite a lack of planning their always appeared a silver lining made of golden opportunities! One such opportunity appeared in the form of a change in career. There were wanted signs posted all down town asking for tractor trailer drivers who could travel long distances. Being single without children, he had no obligations preventing this chance to make something of a small fortune. Yet the hardest part of getting started was the actual getting started! "Groan! Don't know if I've got any coffee left in the downstairs kitchen, but oh well. Why must I suffer so?" he frustratedly exclaimed to himself. This routine was typical of his usual mornings.

"The Duke of Edging and His Thirstful Maid" Alternatively one could also name the series: "Forever Cockblocked by a Witch's Curse"