@gabriel_true yo I returned so now it’s your turn bro-ham, bro-entine, bro-tini, broski, bro-ba, bro-liscious, bro-inator, and all things bro. Do it for Chuck Norris.

Came back from back bicep day and laying in bed doom scrolling while enjoying every second of pain in my fibers uffff lol

I'm about 60 hours into my project. Right now I'm just concepting designs. I'd say I have about 80% of my core functionalities planned out. I have a jackpot progressive that builds during reel battles and has a really small chance to hit but once it does it's an instant win and has huge rewards. It's fun to generate some pictures to see what concepts would look like.

If my ex talks about me, I wouldn't know.lol We have a kid together and I still don't know nor care if she does, as long as it's not yo or around my son. If we had no kids? She'd be like all my other exs, like a fart in the wind.lol No point keeping up with them or their circles.

01010000 01101001 01110011 01110011 00100000 01101111 01100110 01100110 You have to speak to the bots in their own language.

I don't like people who glorify schizophrenia on Twitter. They be like schizophrenia is a super power. I'm schizomaxxing. If I'm not schizophrenic by 40 I have failed as a thinker. Mind you the shit is completely random what type of voices you get. The voices may not be helpful at all and just random noises or worse horrifying noises. And, praise God I don't have visual hallucinations that's even worse. Though I don't think I have schizophrenia in the random sense. My voices always feel targeted which I'm thankful for because in the early stages of schizophrenia it's hard to determine what's real and what's fake thankfully my voices wasn't random because that would of made my delusions random. My voices always say the same thing. Your powerful. Your ugly. Your evil. They just trying to put chains on me because they scared I'll move. With great power comes great responsibility. That's why I think they tell me I'm powerful lie. They want me holding a responsibility a human can't hold and crumble under it's weight. The I'm ugly lie and your evil lie is to drag me into the darkness. But, when I'm there I discern. They just want to make me scared of myself and scared to move. Did I benefit from these half truths half lies deceptive chains I sure did once upon a time when I shouldn't have been moving. Those chains helped me discern myself more to be sure I can move when nothing in life was stopping me. Are they still useful? A bit though I don't like the chains the voices put on me because they try to drag me into darkness. I benefit from this situation being called evil and ugly repetitively causes me to discern myself often making me bypass a sure nature which helps me not get complacent. I'm a narcissist after all. Being sure of myself sounds like a trap. When I know there could be more flaws to be discovered. But, still I rest in the peace of sureness everyday. Sureness of myself and the sureness of God. Because it's the only defense against the voices. But, should I really be sure of myself I know it's correct to be sure of God or should I be in a low place surrounded by my darkness until the light within me recognizes it. Problem is I'm happy how I am. I made great strides. I don't want to willingly put myself through more punishment and let down my guard against the voices they are uncaring whether they destroy my mind or not and I think it's there goal. It's only through God gift of discernment I benefit. It's not like they helping me I helped myself in the chaos they caused. And, the people that glorify schizophrenia gloss over how sticky it got in the beginner stages. I could of hurt someone or myself. This illness has claimed so many lives so i wouldn't call it a super power the voices are to uncaring for that. It's not like i can just revert to being unsure even if I still can't know what I don't know and I can't even reach that low place to find out because I'm sure of all my effort. I seen the progress. I'm kinda sad that I have self esteem now and can validate my heart because I can't reach that low place because that's where my best work get done. Though I know the voices will keep trying to destroy me so there is a chance I visit there again until I'm sure the chain breaks. It was horrible times being tormented so I wouldn't glorify this illness. But, I know all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose. Edit: Now the voices don't bother me and that bothers me. Cause I'm not perfect why so unbothered just cause I put in a little work and can see myself in a new light. I'm only human my ego defends against unwanted feelings. But, I know the voices will keep trying to change that. Maybe my ego will crumble some days and I will see what I been missing. Edit: Though I know God is better than these voices and more gentler. I will keep praying he saves me from this crude approach to life.

An art trade done for one of my moots. I experimented with lighting and shading. I hope you like it. I'm still in a pretty bad situation, so if you like my work and want your own, you can become a Patron for as little as $3 a month or donate $5 through Kofi. Kofi: https://ko-fi.com/corutanic Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/cw/rakashael/membership

Had to reach into the old archives of my dusty ass closet for this shit. Got an unedited one, and one with obvious fucking edits. Regardless... and dare I say it? She steel on my balls till I run. Edit: My shit is missing a button, isn't it? Fml I guess.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1OzJVlp-qO4 Everyone's smiling, they're smiling. It pushes me far, far away. I can't understand. Everything is blue. Can you hear me out there? Will you hold me now? Hold me now? My frozen heart. I'm gazing from the distance, and I feel everything pass through me. I can't be alone right now. Will you hold me now? Hold me now? My frozen heart. I'm lost in deep winter sleep. I can't seem to find my way out alone. Can you wake me?