@gabriel_true Day 147: The weather report was in fact correct: it was cold outside today and it did snow slightly – but! It's fine because the snowing didn't last long, now it's still cold, but the sun's been shining to melt away the few flakes that did fall. In other news, I told myself that I didn't need more than one cat in a game I'm playing. It's that game Heartopia that I've brought up before, and the first cat I'm referring to is the one I told you about that I had to remove the roof of my home for because he kept climbing up there and not coming down lol, his name is Clawdio. Well, the more you upgrade the cat-caring hobby, you are able to adopt more than one cat...and i resisted the temptation to buy more each time I visited the pet store for cat food, but this time I really couldn't help it! I now have two new cats named: Snowcap and Goldilocks and they are so adorable! I couldn't resist them because Snowcap is a pure white cat with sleepy looking eyes XD, so I couldn't pass him up, and Goldiocks is a female cat (with orange-ish yellow looking hair) with rbf eyes (she looks so fierce and pretty I needed to buy her). Soooooo, yeah...I now have three cats and a dog (her name is Corvette). After buying those new pets and some accessories/an automatic cat feeder for them I only had 2k in my bank account in game...yet somehow as I kept playing the game for a couple more minutes, I looked to see if I hopefully made anymore money since then (in game currency helps you buy land plots to expand your land, so that's what I've been saving for), and I ended up with 100k+ coins XD. I don't know how I achieved that in the 20-30 minutes I was playing, but I'm not complaining. - Hooray For Easy Money!: Wei

I’m honing in on pride thanks to listening to my pastor every morning. There has to be less of me and more of God—less of my way and more of God’s way. When I look at my fight as a narcissist and someone who struggles with schizophrenia, I sometimes find myself asking, “God, why haven’t you acknowledged what I’ve done?” I see that I have more awareness than a narcissist is supposed to have. I try to be vulnerable and completely honest in my reflections in search of truth. I even rely on God’s word when I reflect or write. I’ve learned that I can validate my heart, and I’ve learned to stop my primitive instincts to defend myself. I no longer try to control people, and I no longer need validation if it’s not God’s validation. You knew how blind I was when I first discovered I was a narcissist. I was ruled by impulses that were outside of my awareness. Over time, I’ve even learned to discern the tricks of the schizophrenic voices. Personally, I feel like I’ve come a long way. I’ve even made my girlfriend happy to the point of tears. For a long time I wondered when God would acknowledge my effort. But today I realized that while I have worked hard to grow and change, every good thing in my life is still a gift from God. My effort matters, but the strength and opportunity behind it come from Him. Humility recognizes that every blessing, every success, every outcome, and every reward ultimately comes from God. James 1:17 — “Every good and perfect gift is from above.” I understand now that part of being refined is learning not to take pride in what should belong to God. The glory was always His, not mine. 2 Corinthians 12:9–10 — “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. Weakness was meant to humble us so that we rely on God’s strength. John 15:5 says, “I am the vine, ye are the branches. He that abideth in Me, and I in him, the same bringeth forth much fruit: for without Me ye can do nothing.” I did the opposite of being humble. I became more proud of my strength the more hardships I had been through, as if my strength produced the fruit, when apart from God we can do nothing. I felt more and more deserving of glory as time went on. I just wanted to be a good and strong soldier and be acknowledged by God. I wanted Him to see and acknowledge my effort in some way. But that would have kept me prideful. Zechariah 4:6 says, “Then he answered and spake unto me, saying, This is the word of the Lord unto Zerubbabel, saying, Not by might, nor by power, but by my Spirit, saith the Lord of hosts.” I thought my might and power would be recognized and that’s how my spiritual tasks would be completed. But it’s not by might or power—it’s by the Spirit. And even the strength I thought I had was never my own; it was by His Spirit. So now I return the glory back to Jesus where it rightly belongs. There has to be less of me and more of Jesus—His way, not my way. I hope and pray I continue to be humbled before the Lord. I still want to be a good and strong soldier; I just know now where the strength comes from. I no longer have pride in my successes. I now have gratitude for the One who carried me to them.

https://youtu.be/i0lgJqti_7Y?si=8lcC3wICTZRUWvOu https://64.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m1rj4m6CQk1rp2woqo1_500.gif

I imagine I look a bit awkward listening to music sometimes. I'm a maladaptive daydreamer, so it's easy to get lost in the scenarios I make up inside my head.

https://media1.giphy.com/media/v1.Y2lkPTc5MGI3NjExaWh1czZlcG00aWVieGRlb3lqNmp1ZjVsa2Y3OGpkczdiOWo0d2t2MyZlcD12MV9pbnRlcm5hbF9naWZfYnlfaWQmY3Q9Zw/OpPyw0U5IGZDog5K4U/giphy.gif

The mysterious artifact the player uses is called a Codex. As the player, your codex has a guardian who calls herself Codexa. She aids the player throughout the game and is a manifestation of the codex's will. She comes off as aloof and blunt, but has dry wit. She helps you summon your waifus from the codex. She's the only character design I have so far.

https://media3.giphy.com/media/v1.Y2lkPTc5MGI3NjExd2dta2IzNThwcThqMno3MHVnYXRhNnBscjBhMGg5Nmxxand5bW05NSZlcD12MV9pbnRlcm5hbF9naWZfYnlfaWQmY3Q9Zw/eBCnpuRGBhQGY/giphy.gif

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LuEOymnT8TU Kizuite. I'm here waiting for you. Ima to wa chigau mirai ga attemo. I'm here waiting for you. Sakebi tsuzukete. Kitto kokoro wa tsunagu ito wo tagutteru. Ano koro no watashi me wo samasu you ni. No need to cry.

Some things in life are just gonna be one sided and thats okay. I think expecting anything in the same environment is just going to lead to repetated failure if it involves someone.

That sounds like an incredibly busy day, but I hope the wedding was really fun at least? I've never been to one myself. I've attended more funerals than weddings tbh XD. But, at least you managed to get it done...even if it was incredibly late into the night.