Arc - meeting an angel in my dream

I'm going to re-post the most influential dream I've ever had in my life. I wrote about it years ago on the site but for the life of my I can't find it so I'm writing about it again so I don't forget. I don't know if any of you guys have ever had a life-changing dream but if you have I'd like to know about it.

Before I go into the details of my dream let's set up the situation I was in leading into the dream. I believe I was in my freshman year of college. I was extremely stressed out from the art classes I had to take and was also learning programs I never touched in highschool. On top of that, I was feeling extremely isolated in my dorm room. I never really made much friends in my rural high school life. Even though I strived to change myself I couldn't help but be awkward around girls. Rejection after rejection, barely making Bs in fine art class riding the fine line of losing my scholarship. The grandiose sense of self I built up before entering the big leagues shattered. The self hatred. All of these were factors leading to me spiraling into a depression unlike anything I experienced before. A single dream I had on one of my darkest nights changed it all. All of my depression was gone in a single instant, like the snapping of fingers. I'll get more into that moment in my dream. The dream I never want to forget. The week this dream happened was around Valentine's Day. There was an arts and crafts event in my dorm so I went down and created a custom valentine's day card for a Korean girl I kind of like that hung around the dorms. I knew she liked hello kitty so I did it all hello kitty themed with the characters and I thought I did a good job. I built up the courage and slid the card under her dorm room door. On the day of Valentine's day she called me to meet her by the entrance of the dorms. I was so excited because I thought it was a confession. In reality she apologized and said she wasn't interested and handed me back the card I made. Now, I'm not a guy who cries, certainly never in public but I think I teared up and quickly went back to my dorm. Now this night. This one was a dark one where I don't remember all my thoughts. I do however remember I was crying myself to sleep at 4am.

The dream started out of me in my dorm room, but everything was bare. No bunk bed, no tables, tv, desk, nothing. It was about noon outside. I knew I was missing some kind of class but I didn't care. I found the corner of my room where by bed was and sat down embracing myself rocking back and fourth legit like a crazy person. I had bad thoughts just swirling around in my head like a typhoon and it felt like it was crushing me. The room was completely silent except for the sounds of my own sobbing. I never ever sob, but I was sobbing in my dream. Then I stopped. You know that feeling you have when you feel like somebody just walked into a room and is watching you? I had that feeling so I turned around and then I saw somebody. There was no door opening or closing or footsteps, she was just there looking at me. She was somebody I've never remotely seen before. She looked to be somewhere in the range of 12-14 years old and was about 4'11" tall. She looked Asian, but had darker tan skin. She looked like someone from maybe Indonesia. I'm kinda blurry on what exactly she was wearing, but it seems like it was like an oversized white hoodie. I didn't think anything she was wearing looked weird except that she was bare foot. Back to the moment where I saw her. From the moment I made eye contact with her I have no idea why but it felt like the President of the United States walked in on me. Like the biggest celebrity of the world x 1000. My first instinct was to draw myself away but I was already hunched in a corner hugging my knees. Her expression was neutral like she was just observing me. Somehow though, just making eye contact with her was comforting enough to make me stop sobbing. There was something about this girl that was unnatural, but I just couldn't figure out what it was. I guess you could say I was in a trance-like state.

She walked over to me and kneeled, wrapping her arms around me. Now here is where the spark happened. The moment her skin touched me it was like the universe opened up to me. I know, it’s stupid to say it like that. There was an intense combination of sensations that was unlike anything I’ve ever felt before. It was like diving into the sun, but instead of the sun it was a giant ball of warmth and comfort. All of my despair, grief, and depression was gone. I didn’t even feel it leave my body. It was instant. On top of all that, I knew this girl had something way, way more powerful than a human. She was something next-level. I also had a really, really strong feeling like we had interacted before and I knew her well or she knew me well, but I had no idea. All of these feelings coursed through me in the span of an instant. I remember exactly what she said. It was short and to the point. “Don’t be sad. I’ll be here when you die.” At this point I was just elated. However, since my brain neurons were not firing off correctly trying to process all that happened to me I just said the first thing that came to my mind. “Can you be my girlfriend?” The moment I said that I questioned myself why I said that of all things. Up until now she didn’t display any signs of emotion, but it looked like for a moment she found what I said amusing. “Okay.” she said.

She stood back up and backed up. She gave me a once-over glance like she was checking to see if she missed anything, her expression back to neutral. I was just sitting on the floor, still stunned from what happened to me. When I was looking at her she was standing in the middle of the room and directly behind her was the door. On either side of the door were the two large dorm windows with the rays of light pouring in from outside. When she turned around to walk towards the exit, I was completely floored by what I saw. There were two points on her back just below where her shoulder blades were. From there, there were two strong rays of like that looked like they had mass, and they were bending. https://i.ibb.co/Bt8FCDN/test2.png It’s really hard to describe but they looked sort of like wings because they bent about a foot above her head. The rays of light from outside seemed to be interacting with them, making their form waver. I didn’t notice them at all when I first saw her, so they must have just appeared. I couldn’t remember any more details because the moment I saw what I saw I gasped and woke up. I think I laid in bed for a while. I missed my morning classes. I was just trying to go back to sleep so I could ask her more questions. It never happened. I sat up in my bed. Usually at this point the depressive thoughts would start flooding in but I was actually feeling great. I had some kind of long test from the Korean girl from last night apologizing and trying to cheer me up but man, that didn’t even matter to me anymore. I was fine. I didn’t even feel the need to respond. I wondered if I was going to fall into a depression again, but days turned into weeks, and weeks turned into years. Now every once in a while, I have bouts of anxiety, but not once have I fallen into a depression. I’ve pretty much been able to make my peace with everything. This was the dream I had in 2008.

I started thinking about my dream incident recently. I'm almost certain that the person I met in my dream was my guardian angel. It got me curious. Certainly other people had an experience like I did. A central theme is that it's an extremely rare event that they choose to manifest themselves in front of the person they are soul-bonded with when the person they are guarding is about to face a life or death situation. What kind of path was I headed down where I needed to be saved? Why was saving a non-religious person who never goes to church or prays so important? Maybe I have some kind of other purpose like having to die heroically saving people later. Well, if the time ever comes where I have to be a hero, I'm going to make a stand.

I don’t think I’ve ever had a dream like that. But my dad did have a dream once where he was walking somewhere (I think? Maybe he said he was standing on a nice hill) and there was a white woman with long blonde hair that turned around to face him, she had a sunbeam over her head and bright white angel wings. He said it was the prettiest woman he ever saw and then a few years or months later he met our mom in college and I lie to you not, he said she was coming out of choir class with a group of girls and a sunbeam shone just on her head alone and that she looked like the angel he saw in his dream. It would make sense how the angel represents our mom. Our dad was always told by other kids and adults he’d never live past 21 and he started to believe that, was in a fire that almost killed 70 something men (including himself obviously) and he just had a rough life in general. But our mom was the only person who was patient with him and loved him enough to listen when he had his issues... like his own personal angel.

Here's an interesting thing about dreams, no face you see in your dreams have you not seen while awake. It may seem new,but that's your subconscious. We see a litany of people throughout our day, people we don't even consciously pay attention to, but our subconscious picks up on that information and then uses it in our dreams. It's often scrambled and our dreams are very often emotion based. Use that as you will. I still vividly remember a dream of being in what seemed to be a golden field of wheat and in the middle was what looked to be a giant oak. I still remember the peace I felt in that dream, but then I awoke gasping for air. I, however, probably have sleep apnea.XD But, that peaceful feeling still resonates in my very being and makes me wonder if there is more than imagery and emotional processing or something more hidden from the waking mind. Our minds are wonderfully weird things at the best of times. Just food for thought.

@wei_ying Wow, thanks for sharing that story! Maybe your dad has a guardian angel watching over him that not only saved him from a fire but helped hook him up with your mom by showing him what she looked like. Omg that gives a whole new meaning to the word “wingman”