staying single

Don't really go out, most of the time I just focus on my life. Work, studies, personal project, life goals, hobbies, just can't see myself with another person. I feel fine now, don't think that loving someone is really beneficial. No, not talking about having a waifu or something related to that. I have my reasons to stay away from relationships cause to me, I don't think I have the qualities of being a good partner. If I feel that way, then i shall follow. Don't have that much friends either, I just go with what I feel like. Yea I may be a photographer and other stuff that I may interact with people, I'm just doing what I enjoy.

Good on you man, hang in there. I know it can be hard when eveyone keeps telling you that you need to be in a relationship to be happy but that's really just not true for eveyone. These days the benefits to being single far outweigh being in a relationship no matter what anyone would have you believe.

I'm also a bit confused as to the intent of this thread, but I'm pretty much the same way. It's not only that I think I'm not in a good place in my life for one. I also have got some big plans for my life in the near future and I think having a significant other might hinder my progress. I guess the difference between OP and I is that I still want one, lol. Cute girls are cute, man.

What if that one person has their own goals or that they have their lives settled and they know what to do? Me knowing my own qualities better than everyone and that I may end up ruining everything they worked for just for a relationship. Would you still go forward with the relationship or move on with your life without it? I personally need to stay away from any which is my choice.

I'm guessing risk taking is something we all do. Just for the sake of having that confortness and love. Working together for it. Kinda risky for me, if something doesn't fall through and it's get financially bad on both, it's gets worse knowing and experiencing it throughout my childhood. Can't handle things financially for myself sometimes. Ehh...it's just who I am. Sacrifice plays this role, gonna have to both take care of the family. I've did this a couple of times for things I needed for a comfortable state of living. As a brother with 3 sisters, it takes so much when they were little. I'm glad I did for my parents. I just can't imagine have my own though. Anybody can do it or don't, just a choice. So this is more of, would you be ready financially and willing to sacrifice for your love and life's goals? And how are you dealing with them in your life. Me, I'm still dealing with these, even though I'm still single.

donnie - Good observations. A partner will indeed drain resources and energy lowering your productivity, that is the natural cost of sharing your life with someone. You have to gauge if you can do both otherwise focus on your life goals over chasing girls. They are cute and I love them all too but remember no one comes without a cost in some form. Use the solitary time to address and work on the things you want to improve about yourself. Go monk mode and train. If it is socializing with girls go out and make friends without the objective of dating anyone. There is less pressure talking to women if you are not trying to date them. Add some platonic only female friends to your circle or find a fun group of people you could get along with. Meeting more people means more contacts and social experience. A side effect of being seen having fun with women is other women will see this and want to find out what makes you so interesting to other women(pre-qualifying). I think you and OP might have a common trait which is why I asked him the question above. I am not trying to be a jerk but I gather from posts and body language in pictures from you both that tell me low self esteem may be part of the issue. Neither of you are bad looking but do not project self confidence either. Self-deprecation can be funny sometimes but when it becomes a frequent channel of communication you are actually bleeding yourself out self-esteem wise and can advertise low social value. Your body language can change over as well time to something that communicates low social value louder than your words ever could. By staying in a negative mindset you are programming yourself to negative outcomes. Hit the gym because it raises your testosterone and metabolic functions and you look more healthy and feel good. Work on being you best self and love yourself first otherwise you will be poorly equipped to do it for someone you care for when you meet them. There is nothing wrong with living single but traditionalists will sometimes try to shame you into think so. Make sure you are single because you want to be not because you think that's all you can manage otherwise you may regret it later.

Ah should have refreshed before posting lol. Starwind if you do not want the family life that is your choice and there is nothing wrong with that. I do not have the desire to have kids or even get married anymore so most women are a waste of time since I will not give them what they want and I accept it as it is.

Yes body language was never my thung, can't really project myself out there. I just wonder around looking at stuff and not pay attention to people. Not that I don't want to be part of society but just be myself out there. Yea I do workout at times and travel around to places. Interacting with people outside of my hobby is just another story. My communication sucks...ugh. In groups, I listen to people talk and I give no responce to any of their topic because it's something I can't relate to. Next thing you know, I the quietest person in the group. I tend to stay away because my social engagement with others is just an all time low throughout my years. Only talk to those that I have close friendships with which is very few irl. Yea, some women are a waste of time and money if we don't find the right one. Do happen to find one that's just right by her personality, best to have contacts only if I'm sure to stay in contact. Back then i would try to ask out a girl or have crushes, but my social self isn't that great with others so I'm always left out in the dark. From what I understand back then, you would have to be committed to something most and be accredited by those who noticed to even be recognized to them. And to even spark their interest. Now I'm long into the position of being comfortable into of where I'm at and accepted it.