As long as you're able to explain and demonstrate that you are the responsible one who is taking care of your mother instead of your mother still taking care of you during your adult years then there shouldn't be anything majorly unattractive/repulsive about that.
There is nothing repulsive about living with your mom. I think thats the wrong word. Unattractive? Subjective too. Some may care. Some may not. However you can't be lazy. At bare minimum have a job.
If you're ever having suicidal thoughts, just know that you don't actually want to die. You still want to live, just a different life.
Do what you want to. If you are unhappy with a situation work on it. Passing time idly is a luxury, but provides no benefit.
That's a lot of steps.