Reoccurring Theme

Megitsune. That is quite true. A lot of people don't listen when they should. Giving support to others is important and calling someone insane for examble is bad. Abuse does happen and so does just simple misundestandings or lack of effort in these situations. Feeding the others fear is also bad but there are also times when those fears manifest from the persons own ideas and thoughts even though the other side has done nothing wrong or even indicated any possibility to cause those fears. Communication is difficult because of the difference between two people and that is life. Not every interaction and relationship goes well and was not meant to be which should be recognized. No one is perfect which is why we always have room to grow, learn and do better but at the same time no one is the same. We should not condem the other person be it man or woman if things don't go well (unless there was serious abuse/violence happening). There are others out there that will match better to each individual person and when those are found that is worth keeping. We just need to be more civil when talking about others and not jump to calling people in humiliating ways. Concerning about being emotional and sensitive. It is not bad but those traits can sometimes/in extreme cases lead to manipulative behaviour even if theres only good intentions. In these cases some people are able to calm the situation but others can't. It varies person to person and situation to situation and if they can't overcome those situations then it just means that it was not meant to work. Some might not like this idea but it is how things work. A calm person might want a calm personality in their lifes as then theres mutual behaviour and understanding in situations. Being with a different personality can easily wear the other side which is why some leave those relationships even if no one did anything wrong.

I do agree that people call the "abusive" card real quick. And often, after hearing both sides. Its not really abusive at all. Guy and a Girl are dating, Guy wants one thing, girl wants another, after that is realized one starts becoming distant, because they arent confrontational, and then they break up. The growing distant was considered emotional abuse. Abuse? Eh, I dont believe that would qualify as abuse. That would be like saying ghosting is a form of manipulation or abuse. No, thats just avoidance. For my scenario in this post? Would you find that abusive? If after finding out that you both wanted something different out of the relationship, so the other got more distant before you guys broke up? (Granted in this same scenario, its noticed that the other person is getting distant so they try to address what was wrong)) I know what abuse is. My Ex is the perfect example of one. She didnt like that i went out with friends when she was unavailable. She didn't like that i had a best friend, whose house i could often be found at because he and i game pretty often with a few other friends. This ex also accused me of cheating on her, with said best friend. Like she LITERALLY accused me of cheating on her with a man. (im not bi. And in her defense she did have a BF cheat on her with another guy before who WAS bi) If i didn't want to do something, either because i had other obligations or it just wasn't what she wanted, she started to resort to balling her fist and hitting me. After she realized she was too little to actually hurt me (after i put a stop to that hitting in the first place, slamming on your brakes works to pull someone out of rage mode in the car. so i got her to at least pay attention when i talked) she resorted to emotional abuse. Maybe she should go pay her ex a visit, since i didnt want to have sex with her that day (it was just one day) she tried to pull the pregnant card (though her father had already shown me papers saying that while she can have children WILL require medical help to do so) and at the end, since i was "paying more attention to my best friend" who was just broken up with at a convention, so admittedly i was trying to make sure he cheered up, she decided to cheat on me that weekend. on the same day that she and i had went a few rounds anyway... so the "you wouldn't" wouldnt work here. ^Things like that are closer to being abuse. If a guy finds a girl abusive because she is a little cool (as in a bit frigid) stop it. Same for the other way around. Also, people on this site often also play the creep card... a LOT. Often times the person is just an avid texter (i KNOW i am) so there may be a little spam. its fine. you are on a site full... FULL of psychological and sociological quirks. youll get a few people who dont talk the same way you do. dont label them just because they have an interest in talking with you. Granted some people cant take a hint, and need to be forced to see they need to stop. As for the reoccurring theme on this site, yeah, its going to happen, and the only thing we can do is make people aware of it, to hopefully lessen the problem. This site, whether used for friends, or for dating, making it unwelcoming for females is not going to help. Edit: About being emotional and sensitive. Im a person who can conform to the other. i can be sensitive and emotional, or i can be calm and reasonable. Often, i am a mix of both in a normal setting. But the "manipulation" is just a by product of what is happening in the relationship. A person upset cuz you didnt come see him or her, isnt a "You should spend less time with your friends" but a "I like to see you so i wished you came". But often people miss on what should be done here, the non-sensitive should be like "i like to see you too, and i shall at (_time_) i promise." OR the sensitive should be understanding and try to hang out with THEIR friends in the mean time. (This is just one scenario, there are many others but i wanted to use this as an example) when you have two personalities, what makes it work is that they begin to rub off on the other, the calm and level headed, become more sensitive to whats happening, and show a bit more emotion and want. While the emotional and sensitive, feels more calm and centered because they have something reassuring to balance them out. But i agree with MKraft, on that often the different personalities wear down the other enough, to cause a break, and in the end, really no one did anything wrong.

You aren't wrong about the revenge attitude. I think i mentioned that in an earlier post, but a lot does come from bitter feelings. and in a site that has a bit more men in it... And your experiences are your experiences, and you are not to be condemned for feeling the way you do. After my ex, i was not fond of women for a while...

Arguments are normal and ok because of the differences. If arguments happen due to nonsense (for example causing an argument only to cause one etc non valid reason) then it is not good at all. But when someone says that you can't have an argument with good reasons then it is just ignoring the other side. With revenge attitude. This is a problem but not from one side only. Both men and women are having tough times resently as the opposing side is causing slander and revenge group mentality. Both men and women looking down on others and accusing stuff are both an issue that should not happen. It is sad that the trend of behaviour can't find a common middle point of acceptance and just seems to go to the extremes of the pendulum. Personally I just hope that things eventually get better in this front. Until that and after it, all we can do is our best.

I know I am late with this...But...Can someone PLEASE explain to me where is this magical world where women have the upper hand in life? Why do I feel like I mentioned this already... But when I say upper hand; things like...People holding the door for you, shallow advances and kindness from other men, all of that... I am not interested in those kind of benefits. We even have people saying women have the upper hand in court? (Uhm...I guess if its something sexual I can understand that...But..) Where is this magical world where women have everything?

@Neeto For the record I am pretty sure no one was talking about you in this thread till you came about on your own. To be completely honest...Would of definietly prefered if you didnt. Well I cant speak for most women, if anything I think I am mostly speaking for myself. And what I have noticed here. I am not talking about other dating sites, I am talking about MO; I dont use "other dating sites." Oh god here we go with the nice guy entitlement. And for what reason does anyone have the right to have their messages read? No one has to acknowledge you in this world they dont want to. No one has to feel bad for "All the guys that got their messages ignored." I am gonna address this thoroughly.. Just because you have nice guy syndrome, it doesnt entitle you to anything. Just because you talk to someone it doesnt entitle you to a response. And theres no reason to keep a grudge on someone because they decided to ignore you. Its your choice; odds are you dont even know the person anyway so theres not much to cry over. As for that guy...Anyone who does that...Shouldnt really expect anything more than negative response... If we are thinking of the same guy...That thread was cringey and poorly presented; I get the feeling even he knew that... As for the special treatment of women. Again. Me personally...Dont see this special treatment...Im not flattered by shallow behavior or false kindness that disapears as soon as it becomes clear that I am not interested in a fuck date or even a regular date for that matter. If anything I found being a girl to be a burden. You never know who to trust. Sometimes I think I made a great friend, till they pop the question, I say no. And their personality flips entirely. Its like guys dont want to be friends with girls at all. And that really sucks. Its stupid. I am not blaming ALL of men. I dunno if you just pretended I said that so you can tell me that I cant do that. But... I mean whatever. Just because there can be worse...Okay there can ALWAYS be worse. Just because it can be worse it doesn't really make anything...Better, its not helping anything. Just because it can be worse it doesn't mean that it stops being a problem. Your entire post...Kinda had like...Nothing to do with the topic I am talking about. I have to babysit the thread to keep nonsense like this at bay.. If anything I must thank you, now I have more content for my exhibit.

This thread... https://pa1.narvii.com/6259/8bbbc4e3cf32b390f3f777d2df95e2b5b1241b1e_hq.gif