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I hate myself.

Let's explain. Of course this is a ''click bait'' title, but it's true. I expect from myself to be some high famous director(want to become one, a director). I have no achieved this(obviously) and those expectations have crushed my self confidence. I hate myself, I don't have a great personality, get scared easy, have no social skills whatsoever and in my opinion I'm a dick. I have pushed people away with my negative thinking, making me go down the spiral. I am suffering from depression and a burn-out which I blame myself for. I know there are some people who will say: ''Get over it'' but it's not that easy. Pessimism and self hate have taken root in me for so many years that it's hard wired in my brain to think like this and it's difficult to understand any other way of thinking. I hate myself as much as thinking that I'm waisting oxygen that someone else could use way more. Yes I seem open to some, but I don't understand half of the things the masses and a lot of people do and why it is the way it is. The reason for making this, is seeing if someone relates to me or just to open a discussion. Thank you for reading any if not all of my whiny bullshit and have a great day.
Mar 25, 17 at 3:15pm
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Cameron Started as a truck driver https://www.youtube.com/user/caseyneistat?gl=DE&hl=de As a 17-yo dad. Yes, they are extreme examples but it is possible. We all have our low points yet it does change. They made it, you can make it. Get out, get some fresh air and pick up a sport. Can't stress enough how important health is for creativity. Sure you can pull a Jean-Paul Sartre, Van Gogh or Steve Jobs. But personally I look up to none of them and none of them were ever actually happy. Aside from maybe Steve Jobs but that guy was nuts. Health also lengthens your life and gives you more time to fulfill your dream. Lastly you're one in over 7.5 Billion. You fucking up your life doesn't actually matter. We're unimportant dots, most of which would probably considered a "waste of oxygen".
Mar 25, 17 at 3:21pm
Maybe you need a vacation to a nice place.
Hey man I'm your friend ^_^ Also I have felt that way about myself to man I understand. But I've been working in construction a lot for the last few years and honestly in the first month it pulled me out of the depression I was in. It feels really good to get up in the morning and go somewhere anf move your body and figure out how to get the job done. At the end of the day I'm always sore and tired, but it's not a bad thing. It feels really good because I was productive and worked my body and mind. And when I get home I can relax with a beer and watch anime >…< It isn't what I wanna do for the rest of my life, I have dreams too but we all have to start some where. Anyway man sometimes all it takes to feel good about yourself is just to do something productive for the day ^_^ Feel better man I'll tty when I get off work <3 *hugs*
The founder of KFC was a man living on a paltry social security check, he decided he had enough of living month to month on it and asked himself how he can make some $, he decided the only thing of value he had was a fried chicken recipe, so he started going from restaurant to restaurant tryi g to get someone tombuy or partner up with him, he was told no by more than 1000 restaurants before he got his first yes.... now we have KFC GET UP AND TRY AGAIN
Cero @cero commented on I hate myself.
Mar 27, 17 at 4:12am
This account has been suspended.
Okay....shit....hope it's okay I'm typing so much.... You have high expectations and goals, as many do....and ambitions like that take time, experiences, and connections...but if you feel crushed under how high your ambitions are, the best thing you can do to unburden yourself is to find another smaller ambition....you know, start off small and work yourself up....hell, I don't think there's many very talented who can say they became a superstar by not working a long and hard time for it....I'm not telling you what to do, but if your goal brings you this down, it's better to lower your standards, or you'll just keep ending up in despair.... I don't know you personally, but your bringing yourself down a lot (that's what depression does after all) based on what you hate about yourself....despite all this self-loathing, you sound like you genuinely care about others....that pessimism and self-hate is giving yourself a really hard time man....working to get your brain outta that mindset seems to be what you need to work at....if you don't try, you'll stay stuck and things won't change man....changing how you think is fucking hard to do, but it's better than where your at right now....to try and help you understand a better way of going about things rather than bringing yourself down, there's accepting what you are and choosing what you wanna change and what you wanna make apart of you....I mean, anyone can change....it's either or, cause otherwise, your just in a puddle of depression and despair that won't get you anywhere towards progressing as a person, and extending to reaching your goals and ambitions....but cut that shut out saying your a waste of oxygen....I ain't gonna go saying your here for a reason, but everyone's got potential and can do a lot in their life for themselves and others depending on who they wanna be....no one's a waste of air just because their down in the dumps due to unfavorable circumstances....that shit's what makes us human....going through shit times and coming out of it, not knowing where it's gonna lead us but keep on pushing regardless....everyone's has times when they feel overburdened for a multitude of reasons from who they are, how the "world" is, break-ups, and such.....my point is, no one is a waste and everyone always has something to give another person....knowledge, perspective, information, kindness....all that jazz... As for the "masses"....well hell, depends on how your perspective them and what you exactly mean by that....do you mean people in general? (Don't ever think your opening up to others is "whinny bullshit"....that shit takes courage to do....even if it's just to ask for help/advice/etc....plenty of people won't always give the best of advice or help when you open up, and might even bring you down or give shit advice with saying things like "Get over it", but regardless, talking and opening up to others can release some burden off of you and give you perspectives and support you hadn't considered before) Either way, idk if you'll respond to this or even read by 4 paragraph shitpost, but regardless, I wish nothing but the best to yourself bro....and that you'll at the very least smack the living shit outta your depression.... *crawls back into my chasm and sleeps*
I see what you mean, but I'm somewhat on the other side of it. I'm 26 years old and have two brothers; one is 3 years older, has a wife, kids, family and the other is my older twin brother who has a $65k/yr job and will likely be making over $100k within 3 years. I am still in university, for a third college degree, and I'm still not sure what I want to be and do. I feel like I've wasted much of this time for something that is not even going to make me happy. But you know what? I keep my head up because I know I could still be working at McDonalds as a fry cook, barely making $100-$200 a week. I could be so, so, so much worse off and I know of my capabilities. I know I am destined to greatness and I will get there, but it takes patience. It freaking SUCKS having to wait to get to that greatness, but I know when I get there, it will be worth it. I will be happy and have a fulfilling life, but it takes time and hard work to get there. Back to your problems: You're a dick? Nah! You're self-assertive. Be a manager and delegate jobs. Those employees will get the job done if they know they can't slack off. No self-confidence? Find a sport or hit the gym. Get some exercise in and develop a plan that you can see progress in. Or a hobby. Something that you can see a progression of ability and/or skill. First thing in the morning, make your bed. The first thing you do is getting something done. Negative thinking? Try practicing debate skills, where you see two sides of each issue. This will develop into being able to see the good and bad of a situation. Burn-out SUCKS. I've been there. I know you said don't say Move On, but suck it up Buttercup, make the leap into something different. Think you're wasting everyone's oxygen and time? Well, guess what? So does anyone who is shy and doesn't speak up! Find something you're good at and talk to people who are not as good at it. You'll have plenty to share that is worth it. Look, bro, you don't have to be perfect, but if you don't actually go out and do stuff to become better, then you will be stuck where you are.
many. MANY people hate themselves on this planet, there aren't many who don't many, secretly do hate themselves, even if for shortish periods of time. I hate that I can't help everyone. I hate that I don't have super powers to save people via vigilantism. I hate that I can't fix everything for everyone on the entire planet, and create separate universes for each individual person no matter how fucked up the things they require to be happy. Even Donald trump would be happy. I hate that my friends suffer and I don't suffer as much as they do combined or more. I hate that I can't take on their suffering instead of them having to deal with all of the stress. I hate all of this about myself, and more. things like how I'm clumsy, how I stutter sometimes and fuck up my wordspeaks.
Apr 02, 17 at 12:52pm
You know something? Loving yourself and thinking positive is something you can't just do over night. It may in fact be the hardest thing someone ever has to do in their life. But the point is, its a skill, not a privileged condition. And it's a necessary step to be truly happy in this world. You kinda have to psychologically rewire your own thought process. You really have to if you're so conditioned to hate the world and yourself. And if necessary, you have to find any backdoor into your subconscious you can. Surround yourself with positive people, cut toxic relationships (And ways of thought), and just learn to live in the moment rather than what has happened, what will happen, and what you think is happening under the surface. That's a good first step. Lastly, understand that being a positive person means to always be at war with your own reality. Take it from me. I have 10 dollars in my bank account, have been in unrequited crushes for the last four times I've liked someone, am unemployed, and might not even have a house for very long, and just had a bike stolen by the snallygaster. And yet because I've done the groundwork, I don't hate myself, or any of the people I surround myself with. And that gives me stable enough ground to work out of my problems. To turn away from despair. Already have a plan, finally got the information I need, and won't let it happen again when I do get out.
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