These Videos helped me how to understand women

There's a real difference between "good looks" and "being attractive". One of them is physical, the other is about your mind. If you're just judging based off of looks than why are people like Matt Smith consider attractive? Sacha Baron Cohen dated Isla Fisher! Jared Leto has also gone through his fair share of hot women while looking... like that. Steve Buscemi is in a happy and stable relationship. And before the inevitable, "But they're famous and have money, etc." starts up. Let's consider the spouses of celebrity women to non-celebrity average joes. Cynthia Nixon married Danny Mozes (professor) and he is not what everyone would consider super good looking. Julia Roberts married Danny Moder (cameraman) who has an incredibly large forehead that could rival Matt Smith. Tina Fay's husband (composer) is both not incredibly great looking and short to boot. So no, I don't buy that a person's relationship success is so based on just physical appearance that you need to "trick" aka bully someone into giving you the time of day.

Here's the deal, there's no trick to attraction. Either you get lucky or you don't. Lie and you will be shown to be a liar. If there was some big secret, it would've been found long ago. It's just like those penis enlargement ads, there's no sure fire way to get exactly what YOU want EVERYTIME that and, it just doesn't work. Some only go for looks, some truly only go for personalit and some want both, there is no universal. But, believe in your own opinions if they make you happy.

@yaasshat Wait......... Those pills don't work?! :p

@yaasshat It -is- luck-based (Meet the right person at the right place at the right time in the right way), but that doesn't mean there aren't ways to increase your chances. And there might not be a universal, but there are averages. That said, I've seen enough of this kind of material to know that there are parts of this kind of philosophy to internalize, and parts that only work under certain circumstances and with certain mindsets. I'm not out at in the club or at the bar every weekend, actively looking for any attractive girl to talk game on. If I'm talking to a girl, I'm talking to -that- girl and other girls become secondary. Here's where parts of that philosophy come in, however. When I'm talking to a girl, I don't put her on a pedestal or in any way talk to her as though she's my superior. She is, at the absolute most, my equal, and I talk to her as such. The underlying concept behind shooting playful insults at a girl (The term is "negging," if I'm not mistaken) is somewhat sound, but the execution is misguided. The playful insults (Emphasis that they're supposed to be playful, not mean) are meant to lower the girl's "social value" relative to the guy's. This becomes unnecessary when the guy already has social value and doesn't supplicate to every girl he encounters. Social value, however, is relative and situational, which is why the practice of negging caught on. For example, I might have a high social value at an anime convention, since I run panels and my Zero cosplay is on point, but my social value would be much lower at a nightclub or a bar. Lowering someone else's value relative to your own is an easy and universal way to make yourself seem more valuable than you actually are, which is why those little insults are so commonly recommended. (It's worth mentioning that a lot of the people who create this kind of material do it as a way to make money, so they benefit from playing to guys' preconceived notions about the dating scene (("friend zone," the "girls date jerks" narrative, etc.)), regardless of how accurate their actual advice may be.) (It's also worth mentioning that there's a REASON guys have those preconceived notions about the dating scene. They've observed it firsthand.)

@TE Anubis I agree. There are some social nuggets to glean but most of it is to get money out of desperate people. The ones for women are not much different. I have heard the term negging before as the pick-up hook up scene here is fairly lively with so many colleges in the area. Some of these 'techniques' are shaky crutches until you overcome whatever and get real social skills and confidence IMHO. The idea of negging is to alternate playful and edgy banter in a cycle that forces emotional responses to flip pos/neg feelings over and over to induce a hormonal reaction. I see some girls fall for these childish games. I'll skip the long science lesson on why it can work. If you are gaming party girls that like drama negging can work well to make yourself interesting and entertaining when done right. All 'game' is just a numbers game and some luck and nonsense. If you do not look/smell like a fresh burn victim and socialize enough you will run into someone eventually that will like you.

@DarkuSchneider Exactly. These things are mostly strategies for a numbers game. They're geared toward hitting up as many women as possible, usually not even with the goal of anything long-term in mind. Honestly, though, the fact that this kind of material is even seen as necessary is sad to me, and perhaps not in the way people might think. It tells me that dating is just broken. Us guys are fucking CONFUSED. We don't know what to do because we're so rarely given a chance, because women aren't straightforward with what they're looking for, and because women, regardless of all that, still expect us to make the first move, so people like the gentleman in the videos see this as an opportunity to make money off of the sheer DESPERATION of these guys who just want women to pay attention to them. And guys PAY money to learn these "secrets" because they -are- that desperate. Guys see these strategies work for other guys, while seeing other strategies not work. But then they're shamed for doing that, so we're at a point where we're damned if we do, damned if we don't. Either we try out this stuff and increase our chances at getting the female attention we desire (And endure the shaming), or we continue the methods we've been trying that have left us lonely and wanting. It's no surprise that a lot of men are willing to give this stuff a try, because the underlying psychology is pretty sound, regardless of how misogynistic some of these techniques might be. Don't back people into a corner, because then they'll do whatever works best for them, regardless of the consequences. Ladies: If you don't like the mind games, the manipulation, the negging, etc., you need to give guys a chance. Give them an "out." Men are backed into a corner right now. We don't know what to do, we're confused, and the only people out there willing to give us guidance are other men looking to make money off of our desperation and insecurities. Be the replacement to those guys.

Wait, so I should put myself in an uncomfortable situation because guys who legit creep me out need a chance for me to get to know them better? It's cool to push my own boundaries just because he might get his feelings hurt? I don't know, I think that's a pretty tough sell.

If I actually have to bother using these kinds of "techniques" to "get" women, then fuck the dating scene in general. If any woman is actually attracted to a man who needs to "stand out", there's definitely more to him than him just treating her poorly or "negging" or whatever you want to call it. To me that breaks it down to the most basic and superficial level. If a woman would actually be attracted to someone acting that way, (especially if it's being fake and not normally how he acts) then she's not worth dating imo. Most girls who actually have a brain know what they want. Almost everyone is picky, plain and simple. If she's not into you, then she's not into you. There's definitely things you can do to improve your chances. (exercising and eating better, making it a point to go out and be social, etc.) But at the end of the day, you are who you are, and if you have to follow some unproven guidelines to potentially meet a girl, then you're going about it the wrong way imo. As Xueli said, a girl is either going to like you or not. There rarely is much middle ground on the situation, and it's up to that particular person to pick up on the body language, actions, and interactions when getting to know someone new. It's NOT honestly that hard.