Just be yourself.

Probably the advice I give to everyone who wants to get into a relationship. Though I've been reflecting on it, it's starting to feel like just a lazy response, or I just don't fully grasp what it means. I understand being yourself let's the other person make an accurate assessment of what they're getting into, and you'll potentially gain some confidence by being who you are. But what if a lot of us are just inherently have bad impressions of ourselves? I can think of being myself as doing whatever the hell I want, talk about myself a lot, and creating lots of chaos. Just who I am. Seems like that'd be a horrible impression to just be myself. Sure, I wanna be honest with who I am, and have nothing to hide. But wouldn't I want to "act" better than who I am? Or is that becoming too dishonest? Anyone got a got a good interpretation of what it means to 'Just be yourself' or a better alternate advice for good start in a relationship?

In some part it means staying true to ones self. Do not put on a dog and pony show to please your partner. People who run around acting like 'yes-men' contrary to their true beliefs to get approval do not get it much in the end. Be sociable but do not put on a fake act presenting yourself as something you are not.

Just be yourself. My personal opinion on this statement is that we must act by showing our true self but make sure that this doesn't harm others in an offensive way and have respect. It can be quite hard to do it to be honest xD Since there's this thing that we act and talk depending on who we deal with like for example, classmates and family. I too talk a lot about myself to others especially with my family but my father doesn't like it xD So most of the time, I talk about myself to my mother and my friends. A good start for a relationship, think positive and expect the downsides as well. Kind of ironic xD There's this thing that we want to impress our significant other by doing good in school or in your job, improving yourself or quitting a bad habit that will surely make them happy :) One of the best things to do is keep getting better as a person and honing your skills ^^ Feel free to message me anytime if you want to ask more :)

I agree with tusbaki. I don't think be yourself and do whatever you want are the same thing. Everyone has bad traits that are part of who they are. Those are the things you work on. Accepting yourself for who you are and not bending to what others think you should be is what I think the phrase, " Be yourself" means

Yeah, like anyone's gonna do that. The way I see it soon as people go on a date they fix themselves up like they usually don't, do things with people they usually wouldn't, and act differently in ways to try and impress the other person. Those who don't put on a good show tend to leave bad impressions and end up still single. From what I've seen, dating is all about suppressing your true nature and hiding things that would put people off so you can hook people in and let them find out about that stuff latter on once the relationship is established. It's a piss poor way to start a relationship and it'll just make people break up in the end when everything is built on lies. Of course people should be themselves, I just don't see it happening when so many people have so much to hide.

Neet-one - I guess it's kind of like "putting your best foot forward" vs. "putting a fake one forward" aka the clown shoes. There was a woman's post form another thread that kind of stated it too. It was something like, she was attracted to him because he treated her like everyone else and did not dote over her at work. I think it was in the recent date a co-worker thread?

Oh, hello there :o Okay, here's the thing. Yah, you do need to give a good first impression on the first date (and several dates after that), and that's most likely suppressing a lot of the "bad" habits. This, by nature, just sounds like deceiving and hiding. But that isn't the case. You need to know how to correctly socialize with someone, and set yourself a sort of "self-control." I'll give an example: If a guy tells me he likes watching pornography on our first date, I'll think that's highly inappropriate. I'll think, "Yah, a lot of people like watching porno and that's reasonable, but is that REALLY something you should be telling me on a first date?" You don't flat-out tell a girl, "Yo, I like bondage and other kinky shit." That'll just scare her off; instead further along the relationship, you just slowly tell her the "bad" habits. If she can't deal with it, then it's something that can't be helped, and you move onto the next person who might be willing to accept it.

Everyone says 'be yourself' as if it was some kind of absolute guideline for everything in life, but I don't think it's that great of an advice. To put it simply, the only people with whom I can truly be myself are my close friends and family. With any other person, I make sure to behave like a decent human being would and that's about it.

"Just be yourself. Farting loudly in the living room is O.K!" Alright, that's a bad example. Well, when it comes to dating or thinking of doing so, the essence should really be "do unto others as others as you would have them do unto you". Don't want your boyfriend to sit on the couch and play Halo instead of taking you to dinner? Stop treating him as a shopping bag holder. Don't want him to dress like a slob? Perhaps your dress is a little too avant garde.