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Time before asking for 2nd date?

jas
Jan 30, 15 at 10:47pm
So, the first date went well today. Despite some talk about previous relationships and jumping into things she also indicated we should hang out in the future. Gave me her schedule too so I don't think it was a token gesture. Trouble is she encourages me to take initiative. What is a non-clingy, acceptable length of time between first date and second? Valentines Day is fast approaching and I know she doesn't want to be alone. I don't want to appear to be rushing into things either.. I'm so confused! Any thoughts?
corvo1293
Wait four to seven days , at least that's what my aunt told me,if you do it to early you might seem desperate,probably five days that's what I would do
xueli
Jan 30, 15 at 11:50pm
I feel like if you both had a good time and had a good vibe going, then there's no reason to really wait. I would just send a text the next day. I don't think it's a matter of how much time you wait before asking so much as the way people go about asking that really indicates how desperate one is. Like there's a difference between text, "Hey I had fun last night, I really hope you did to. I wanted to ask if you wanted to go out again (or whatever)," the next day at noon, as opposed to leaving countless voicemails that increase in franticness in a 2 hour span. One is totally cool, the other is...unsettling...
neet_one
EA1294 seems right about waiting just under a week. much longer might seem like you're not that interested, too shot and it'd bee clingy. xueli makes a good point too. If you felt things were really going well and you both like each other then why hold back?
supernerdjason
honestly if you both had a good time and she indicated wanting to got out again you could always call her up and plan a second date for like a day when your scheduals are both free. like you could call and plan it for a week from now, that way it's set but it doesn't seem like you are trying to rush her but something is set in stone.
jas
Jan 31, 15 at 5:51am
Thanks xueli and guys :) Yeah, all this totally makes sense. So far I've had success by paying attention to her when I can and letting us live our normal lives. It really is a fugged up minefield because her boy issues are un-affectionate men and those who demand her attention. Maybe I'll get the courage to ask on Sunday. This Saturday is all about going shopping with family. So, that gives her about two days to let the first date sink in and some space. P.S. Nice nickname SuperNerdJason :)
yaasshat
Firstly, congratulation. Secondly, Relationships are not like a game and therefore they do not have a set of rules. Just approach her as you would want. All you had/have to do is tell her that you enjoyed your time with her and would like to do ot again sometime. Valentine's is a no braine, but you don't have to wait that long. If you want to see her again in the week, that's not clingy. Noe, if you were pestering her and wanted to see her everyda...that might be a problem. Also, never bring up old relationships, you are new and she is new. All bringing up old relationships does is puts pressure on the both of you to live up to or beyound certain comparisons rather than being yourselves. And lastly, nest of luck .:)
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