lesbian dating is hard pls

I can't say anything, I could go into the years of watching lesbians for reasons, against my will, because it was family. lol I literally think it is fine, laugh because unfortunately, it is dating itself that is hard, it has nothing to do with your sexual preferences. =P It is people are extremely picky in general, they have their own preferences, most times, people proactively decide to not like each other at an 80millisecond rate... So you get no say, you just have to be patient, wait for that person who is willing to actually try to build anything with you, and in specific relationships and personality types, you will need to be ready to be ridiculed, made fun of and or whatever else, you might think isn't apart of a relationship... Because most people, in fact, have horrible personalities and it is getting worse as time passes, as people typically as time is passing aren't as self-reflective on why they might not be getting a date. While the same time, it isn't entirely your fault, it is people don't communicate properly naturally, it is acceptable behavior practice and by choose to decide to not, build a relationship, each one for their own reason, regardless of it being friendship or other wise. As I attempted to date for 17 years straight, I highly recommend, going out and looking to date people, because in my time of trying to date women, and believe it or not some bi or or fully lesbian, it is you the person. Most people place value on one another, need to see in advance a reason to even have a relationship with you. If they tell themselves subvocalization thoughts and aren't willing to get to know you as a person, it isn't your fault, it is people need patience and most people want shit yesterday, so they ignore just how much they have no patience, especially if you have no patience with yourself. Which makes even forming a relationship even harder. My grandmother in fact was lesbian my entire life, she did not in that time I saw her have just no issues with her partner and most times, it was in fact my grandmothers own fault, it was weird seeing, someone know what she wanted but she had so many control issues, that even tho she was with a person who loved her, she would continuously use that fact, that since she had previous bad relationships to in fact attack her new partner both physically and passive-aggressively indirectly... They were together for over 20 years that I know but my grandmother was stubborn and wouldn't in most cases see she was the cause of most of their turmoil from constantly trying to control another person, more than just let them be who they are and accept them and just love them as is. As obviously she uses that she was dating someone male previously as the catalyst to her own turmoil, and while trauma is horrible, I have my own. There is no time, you can not be patient with yourself, talk to whomever to share what you are dealing with emotionally and not direct your feeling hurt to convert to attacking others. Hell I have in my past, been called weak and not man enough for being able to cognitively push my feelings onto others, especially those who in most cases cannot supply you with caring but want a relationship anyway... lol Which is absolutely hard to do, regardless of gender type to do, if those people you have an interest in, only want sex but aren't even interested in a relationship in the first place. I personally think, you are worse the wait, you should be patient with yourself, and don't be with someone who can not like or care about you the way you want, as since everyone else is picky, you need to be patient and be picky and form realistic preferences for a partner, that way you know what you are looking for. Because in fact, not knowing what you don't know what you want, can in up in just hurting random strangers for no reason, most cases... I had to be that person, for 17 years of people, deciding I am not worse shit, each for their own reason they would tell themselves in advance to even "going on a date..." lol.. While at the same time, people expect each other to lie to one another entirely too much, in fact, causes paranoia, and doubt not only in self but each other, which in fact dismantles relationships in advancement. I had entirely so many women trying to make fun of me for my autism or my being too honest when it is all about choices. Do you want to be with someone willing to hurt you or are your patient to find those people who are going to not only give you a chance but realize you are absolutely gold and you are worth it, regardless f your sexuality type or gender, you will always be worth being loved period! Just don't settle, and don't let people regardless if their gender type to be abusive to you, less you specifically are into that sort of thing. As most times in that 17 years, I have unfortunately done a ton of self-reflecting, most on things I never did to anyone at all, because most times a person would in fact pretend I was like their ex, by projecting, which then made me feel like something was wrong with me, which in fact made something wrong with me by accepting that doubt in my self, that they assumed... =P All the while, the same person would, in fact, ignore or make fun of me being a virgin retrospectively, using that as an excuse for why. Hell I have been ask to go have sex with a prostitute and this woman was in fact, quite literally serious about me going to have sex with someone else before her, I had to block her... Because she was messaging me if I had done what she ask me every few days... Same with I was recently about 5-6 months ago offered to do porn, by apparently a well-known female producer, she got annoyed that I didn't know who she wain advancement I could tell. She asked me all sorts of questions, literally ignored me, and that I was after a relationship, specifically monogamous, then began calling me names to try to goat me into her web, as if I didn't know that I only wanted to be with only one woman at a time... Which then she called me gay for wanting a wholesome healthy relationship with exactly only one person because I know myself, I'm not trying to make my life harder, I already do that... lol.. It is a huge reason why I refuse to lie about everything because you can not build a relationship solely on lies or it is bound to fall apart less both people, just innately are continuously lying to just hold a relationship even together which isn't fun or healthy at all.. lol...... That is not including fact, most of my behavior patterns are in fact from being raised by women only, the Tsunade patterns, and I am pretty sure if I look hard enough I would find someone complains at me, that is female, about me being male, and that I sit down to pee at all even.. lmao and the reason I shared all that is, the exact reason for why you just have to be patient, get to know one another, and see if you are on the same page. because the point that I am driving is that people are picky in general, it is not your fault or your sexuality time or gender even, it is just PEOPLE. make their lives harder then it needs to be. lol.. The fastest way to tell if someone isn't worth it, is if they have no interest in you and they specifically only talk about themselves and not divulging important information, that is needed to even build any relationship in the first place. Because in that 17 years I met all sorts of people, women get mad at me, because I wouldn't do sexual acts on camera moment I met them, people deciding it was mandatory that I send them nudes, but I wouldn't do at all and others acting like, only I was only person supposed to share any information, only to turn around and they proactively ignored any and all questions I asked but were allowed to ask anything, is good signs of people you shouldn't deal with. While the same time, little information at a time can go a long way, as simple as a favorite color, or shape, because eventually, it might matter, especially when and if you want to even give each other something to show appreciation at all for being there for them, people pretend it means nothing but I'm quite sure that is the best way to a healthy relationship because some people just get overwhelmed easily and you have to be patient allowing them to learn at their pace and most times, that is the issue people don't like, that everyone perceives time differently then themselves. And sometimes not ready to handle your emotional baggage, because they have their own to deal with still, because they are all growing still themselves, and unfortunately most times not even ready to deal with their own..