Reveal your most embarrassing moment

Being repeatedly called a madman by all girls of the class at the same time when I was around 6 or 7. I got legit sad in the following days...

i once waterboarded myself out of curiosity. talk of waterboarding in guantanamo bay was all over the news when i was a little kid, so once when in the bath i put a rag on my face, turned the tap on, rolled on my back and put my face under. i dont remember too much about what it was like, except the obvious not being able to breath. wonder how many other kids did, cause it was really all over the news back then. couldnt be the only one

I was laying out on the beach one summer and for whatever reason, rolled over onto my side. Well, to my surprise and horror, one of my melons slipped free from their boobie basket and said hi to everyone. I don't think anyone saw, thank goodness! There weren't many people nearby. But I haven't felt comfortable wearing any swimsuit since, aha.

Today I was talking about an animation bug I had found with the cat mascot. I was excitedly explaining that you just gotta' get in there and just keep tapping the cat vigorously until it finishes. I couldn't figure out why they were so amused by my explanation and then suddenly it hit me. I was explaining to them how much I liked tapping the cat 'vigorously'. I had no idea that tapping the cat meant female masturbation. I explained to a whole room of my peers how I enjoyed tapping the cat. https://i.pinimg.com/originals/75/2d/3d/752d3ded634517219af9daa2805f8fc3.gif

Hmm I'm not sure actually. I don't have much shame. So many things that could- ah. Got one. One Night at a bar with some friends, I got drunk, I told them all to be quiet. So I could fart. But, I ended shitting myself trying to squeeze it out. I jumped up out of the chair I was like "Woah!" Then "I think I gotta go check". So, went off to the bathroom. Of all possible things, I just take off the underwear, and flushed them. I was surprised they actually went down. I come back to the group and first thing they say... "did you actually shit yourself?" Fuck man I was laughing so hard, but deep in, knew I was embarrassed.

Remember one time in the Canadian-Army, We were learning how to effectively conduct recce and setup Observation and Listening-Posts from the Patrol-base. I got praised for having exceptional weapon manipulation and generally understanding concepts pretty fast... Anyhow... One late night while sitting in my OP, The sergeant I was accompanying left the post for the moment and i accidentally let a blank-round loose. LOL Instead of calling it as an Negligent Discharge, I just radioed "Contact" to my section which essentially is the thing you say once bullets start flying and the fight is on. Thing is... My ass wasn't even aware that it was my gun that went off because of the sleep deprivation and I genuinely thought it was a battle. lmao

Oh boi here we go! So I was a freshman in High School and it was a friday where it was my first Ski Club Trip and I also just so happened to be constipated that very same day. Therefore, I would be drinking a shit ton of water prior. Little did I know that the bus we would take would be the typical school bus: no fancy luggage storage, no extra bathroom, but one tiny trash can in the back (this will be important later). So I am on the bus that afternoon In the middle of the ride there and because I drank a fuck ton of water, I really REALLY had to pee. And not just pee like a dog. OH NO NO NO DEAR READERS! MY BLADDER FELT LIKE I WAS ABOUT TO GIVE BIRTH TO NIAGRA FUCKING FALLS! Because the bus could not stop until the pit stop at a Mcdonalds, I decided in my infinite wisdom to run to the back of the bus and release Natures Beauty in said trash bin with everyone turning to the back of the bus and screaming like they were Fighting game Players watching a hype match at an EVO event which made the dopamine rush from the release feel even worse. Also doesn't help that the back of the bus smelt like pee for the next 15 minutes Of course, I got lucky I didnt get thrown out of the Ski Club, but the teacher chaperone just gave me a stern lecture and made me promise to NEVER DO THAT AGAIN. I became the last person to get off the bus when we arrived at mcdonalds and I opened the emergency door and dumped the Pee out the trash bin. Suffice to say, everyone at school made fun of me for the next week and a half. And to add salt to the wound. The next morning when I arrived at my Dads house from the trip, oly then did my body decide to unleash the shit I was trying to get out!

I've had many but apparently they were so tragic I've blacked them out forever. I do remember once though, I went to an airshow with my aunt. To get to the viewing stands you had to walk through a field and it had rained the days leading up to the show. They had laid out plyboard for people to walk across to avoid the mud. I was wearing really flimsy flip-flops because, well... I'm an idiot? I dunno. Anyway, I dragged my foot a bit, rolled half of my flippyfloppy under my foot which then caused me to face plant. My aunt who had been walking in front of me just kept going. I got up, dusted myself off and caught up with her. Pretty sure only like 8 people saw. I'm sure it was hilarious.