Mental Breakdown Thread

father was a drug dealer cripple that bailed to start a new family, grew up sleeping on the couch because i had to share a room with my sister, abusive alcoholic sister that would scream and destroy my things growing up, called me retarded and a pig, mother was abusive when i was a kid too but she mellowed out and has told me shes sorry for how she acted, when my mom told me she was in jail all i felt was happiness because i finally got the room to myself, mother always worked multiple jobs, was a latch key kid, i have a learning disability so teachers were awful to me because i was slower than most of the kids, came home from school to my sister or her boyfriend drunk often, had the cops called on us because of the noise from the fighting, iv had to call the cops before because of the fighting, sometimes theyd be passed out so id have to get in through the hole in the screen by climbing up the deck, and if that was locked too id have to sit outside til one of them sobered up, was to a point that if i just heard a door slam or someone raised their voice id burst into tears (never been diagnosed but i think that classifies as some kind of ptsd) bullied all through out school, failed a lot of my tests because of my anxiety disorder, tried to kill myself in middle school, cut myself around then too, mom has chronic depression so i always worried if shed do the same to herself, we never had alot of money so even in 6th grade i worried a lot about money, id wash my hands until they were white under really hot water in the bathrooms during classes and other ocd like things but iv gotten over that, i had to leave school in my junior year because my anxiety was so bad i couldnt go in, id just start crying in the car and shaking, so instead i went to "the annex" which is where troubled kids go, couldnt handle school there either so i finished my lessons on a computer at home, i graduated early because of it and was a neet til i was 20 where i got a job cleaning an office building, only to then be let off because i could only work weekends because my mom would drop me off but lifes getting better i guess

i didnt post it for pity xD! its more of a venting thing least i always had a roof over my head and food on the table, and my sister is slightly better now so things are ok >w>/

Damn Lamby, On a real note I can't say I know exactly where you are coming from but my father also chose to sell and do drugs instead of raise me growing up, He would threaten my mom all the time that he would get her killed if she tried to move on, anytime he was around me he was usually drunk or coming down from a high and was extremely verbally abusive to me. There were months where he would go missing and no one would know where he was, as a kid I would cry because i thought he was dead. As I grew older I learned those times he was missing he was living in dumpsters downtown smoking crack. I ended up moving in with him when I was about 15 or 16 as he was in recovery out of guilt, I thought I had to make up for lost time, but he was still so crazy and totally brain damaged from drug use. I basically was raising him and myself untill the age of 19 when I couldn't take it anymore so I moved back with my Mom and brother, around this time I also was in what I thought was a serious relationship with a girl until I found out she had been cheating on me and stealing from me the entire time, I felt stupid cause I thought my Dad was the one stealing my money when it should of been obvious it was her. it was around then I went through a mental breakdown and entered a depressed and alcoholic period of my life, started experimenting with drugs and almost died quite a few times. Eventually I turned it all around and started looking for reasons to live properly again. Now I'm just a borderline NEET who sits around watching anime and playing video games. I got a job working with youth who have autism and as hard as it gets somedays I atleast know I'm doing something meaningful now.

dad was an alcoholic who used to beat the kids, every christmas we would go to my dads just to end up at the police station waiting for our mom to pick us up. I moved around alot as a kid so i never made any friends who stayed friends and after a while i kinda gave up on it. I was left at home alone alot when i was a kid and started hanging out with the older kids cause i couldnt relate to the ones my age. Started smoking weed and cigarettes at 12 which led to other drugs, which i mean helped numb everything. Made alot of fake friends because of it. But also always hid my true self from them because i didnt want to be the annoying little kid. Mom started to pop pills and drink alot when i was around 10 and would just leave the house for days at a time. She was actually a bus driver at the time and used to bring little bottles of wine and drink them thru the day at her job. She ended up getting fired because they randomly did a breath test and she failed. After that i moved in with my dad again, and it was all kinda down hill from there. I just kinda lost myself for a while, never wanting to stay home but at the same time never wanting to stay out. I would stay at the park thru alot of the nights because i didnt have anywhere i felt like going. I got kicked out of school after i moved out to my dads because i brought weed to school and the same guy who sold it to me told on me, so i had to take a 45min bus ride to school everyday after that. Didnt make any friends over there, but I never really did at any of my schools. I had a phase where i used to do acid alot just to kinda pass the time. After i graduated i moved out to be with my grandma and help take care of her because she isnt in the best health and thats kinda where im at now. living next door and going over there every day before and after work. Stresses me out to think i could lose her any day because she has been the one family member who as always been there for me. But such is life i guess.

looks like shitty "fathers" is a trend >w>/ who would have guessed /s