Add onto this story, I'm too lazy to make more.

╔╗Intro╔╗ ∑Demons - funny how closely they resemble humans.∑ ᴖᴗRain downpours torches around the dirt roads are lit, lightning thrashing in the distanceᴖᴗ [Midnight] A few kids dash through the puddles on the dirt road - their feet wrapped with soaking-wet linen cloth. A man is following a few yards behind yelling at the kids to come back with his items they stole as he awakens the whole neighborhood. The kids take a right down an alley a few seconds into the alley and a window opens - the kids were dragged into the house. The man crosses around the corner into the alley just to see no one there. He starts to walk home. ᴖᴗSun rising, the man is well-rested after getting some sleepᴖᴗ The man gets up, brushes his teeth with a horse-hair toothbrush - the bristles are stiff and it feels like he's pricking his teeth. He walks outside onto a cobblestone path. He is ready for another day, but this particular one is where 'everything' started. The man starts to walk the cobblestone path for half a mile until he appears before a blacksmith and approaches him. Man: "I would like to learn how to create armor and weapons, sir!" Blacksmith: "Unfortunately I don't teach anyone how to create weapons and armor for themselves." Man: "Sorry for bothering you then." The man starts to walk back south towards his home. Blacksmith: "But! I am a little backed up on some orders if you would like a job - you get experience and payment." Man: "I will take the job!" Blacksmith: "How much do you know about blacksmithing?" Man: "Nothing what-so-ever-at-all!" The blacksmith sighs, hands the man a piece of paper and asks, "Can I get you to write down everything about yourself here?" The man questions in his mind, "Why?" but doesn't try to question the blacksmith. ╗Name: Felrein Zavorek ╗ Height: 5'8 Age: 19 Sign: Yog ╗Accomplishments: Nothing ╗ Blacksmith: "Hmm, never seen someone born under the sign of 'Yog' before." Felrein: "Seriously? Most of my family was born under the sign of 'Yog,' we were generally a happy family." ۩Fourth wall breaker۩ There's 12 signs to be born under. Infinite Celestial Saryn Hestia Sin Gorgon Hydra Gjallmir The Nine Bloodbane Tyrant Yog Most of the population is born under: Hydra, Saryn, Sin, Celestial, and Gjallmir. The rarest of signs are: Yog and The Nine. Felrein quoting the readers, "What about Tyrant, Bloodbane, Gorgon, Hestia, and Infinite?" Well, those are nice signs, but they're not exactly the nicest of people - so I'll explain the ones I get along with best. "What is a sign and what is it's meaning?" Well, a sign is generally the type of power you're born with. Alike in the show, 'Avatar The Last Airbender' you can be a fire-bender, earth-bender, etc... My sign is 'Yog,' Yog gives off a special power that's unbearably powerful, I'm not saying all the other power's aren't powerful - they are. But the power of Yog can put any population in danger. Imagine going on a rampage with force that creates shock waves while your veins and eyes glow in a pretty color. The next sign I wanna cover is 'Gorgon' they're scary mother fuckers. You could come up to one and 'poof' you're gone within 30 seconds, depending on how much power you have. I've never met one and sure as hell don't want to, their only weakness is you have to be aware of their existence for their power to activate. Now onto 'Hestia' yeah, yeah, I know what you're going to say, "Hestia is bestia!" Yes the sign is based off of the goddess Hestia, but she's not real. We base the name off of her because of the warming power of their healing ability. Alright, I promise - last one. 'The Nine' is a selected nine humans from the gods above. Their power is on another level from mine from birth. They're unbelievable in strength, but their numbers are so low that it doesn't bother me. They generally travel alone avoiding each other because they know they can do anything by themselves even though they're generally just kiss-ass protectors of the world. ۩End Of Fourth Wall۩ The blacksmith brings Felrein towards the anvil, hands him a hammer and tells him to strike the blade. Felrein slams down on the metal hard enough that the still-heated blade has an indent of the hammer. Blacksmith: "Dammit, don't hit the sword like you're fighting your brother - hit it like you're beating your wife, gently with some force." Felrein: "I don't have a wife, nor a brother." Blacksmith: "You're a lost cause." As quite a few hours pass by, Felrein is the only one standing at the anvil trying to mold a sword without indenting it or making it lop-sided. The blacksmith is taking a nap in a bench nearby. {{{Just add onto this story, I'm too lazy to keep creating it.}}}

((Hit it like you're beating a wife is going to set the tone for this wild tale! Rule of thumb and all that noise.)) While the evening wore on, Felrein became increasingly frustrated that shaping metal took far more time and energy than first appeared. His new master was taking an offhand approach to teaching a neophyte. Thinking to himself, "What happened to having some kind of tutorial. At least explain to me how I'm supposed to identify the right temperature for heating each specific type of metal so it doesn't misshapen or break! Good grief..." Toiling in vain for another hour Felrein came to his own breakpoint as yet another piece of ingot cracked under stress. It was an apropos representation of his own mental state!

(It was an apropos representation of his own mental state!) Which is why Felrein-out of his anger of not being able to successfully blacksmith a sword- decided to go visit his favorite Muffin Man, who lives on Drury Lane. And if anyone decides to ask where he's going...well, that's for him to know and for no one to ever find out. It's not as dark as he'd like for sneaking out to the Muffin Man, but it will have to do for now, the sun is setting anyway. So, with a tired sigh, Felrein grabs his cloak and heads out into the slightly chilly outside...'I can't wait to get my hands on a delightfully warm muffin' he thinks as the chill air brushes against his cheeks. (I just hope to see how unserious we can possibly make this story.)

It was twilight upon arrival of the famed bakery. Most businesses were closed at this hour. Still seeing smoke wafting out of the chimney gave hope to a starving Felrein. They say man lives not on bread alone, yet when one is poor even the littlest crumb can numb the fiercest of hunger pangs! Now at the door, Felrein attempts opening. However it doesn't budge! No sign was in the window or posted outside declaring it closed for the night. Rubbing his grumbling tummy with one hand he proceeded to rap upon the wooden frame with the other. "No response." commented Felrein. Looking around to each end of the building he decided maybe there was an alternate entrance elsewhere. The owner wouldn't abandon his kitchen oven that's clearly still hot enough to produce smoke. It'd be disastrous for such a luxurious business to go up in flames. Perhaps he could use this concern as the perfect excuse to snake his way into the shop and prevent this potential fire hazard from occurring. Then take some leftover baked goods as a self reward on the owner's behalf for being so attentive to safety!

As he reaches for the handle of the door, a noise is heard from the back of the shop, a sound that isn't loud enough to startle anyone but it's not too quiet either, it's almost as though someone is whisper shouting-no, singing? Is the muffin man taking out the trash or something? Maybe there's some uneaten snacks the man is tossing away? Felrein's hand hovers above the handle, another cold breeze causing him to shiver while he debates on whether or not to enjoy the warmth of the bakery or investigate the noise. On one hand, he'd be escaping the chilly air, but, if he finds the Muffin Man behind the store tossing out snacks...he could maybe talk the baker into giving him free treats. The whispers of the song are heard again, Felrein deciding that the possible free snacks are worth more than his warmth. "It better be the Muffin Man and not strays eating trash." Felrein grumbles to himself as he tugs his cloak tighter around himself, ignoring the sudden anxiety spreading in his gut as he heads down the narrow alleyway and to the back of the shop, the singing getting clearer the more he heads towards the noise. Felrein freezes as he hears a small voice sing: "Do you know...the Muffin Man...the Muffin man, the Muffin Man. Do...you know the Muffin Man, who lives on Drury Lane?" There's something terrifying about the high-pitched voice...yet it's also hauntingly beautiful to hear, like it's calling him closer. Felrein knows he should turn back, but he can't, not as the voice gets louder and more alluring, as if the notes themselves are caressing his eardrums lovingly. Before he knows it, Felrein walks the rest of the way until he can see who or what is singing, his eyes widening at seeing Gingy (yes, like from Shrek) kneeling over his favorite baker: The Muffin Man, with a threatening aura surrounding him. (I have no idea what I'm doing XD. But I did ask for weird.)

Felrein was perturbed witnessing the horrific sight of a butchered Man of Muffins done in by his own demented creation. Who would have thunk that such black magic could exist that would turn dough this sour! Preparing for an impromptu tussle he looks over to an empty glass bottle to break as a weapon. "I know not what dark arts crafted thee golem of sour dough, but you'll bake in Hell for slaying mine benefactor!" With a loud cry Felrein jabbed downward to pierce the ankle biting monstrosity!

Unbeknownst to Felrein, the very much alive gingerbread cookie was not some random mishap, but an ancient demon that was cursed to be a gingerbread man, the little creature showing a surprising strength as it dodges the broken glass bottle and (somehow) manages to punch the man into the brick wall by punching the ankles alone. Felrein grunts as his back harshly slams against the brick, coughing as he tries to catch his breath, barely managing to dodge the deathly sharp candy canes Gingy flung at his head.

The souless ginger cookie forges a spear from mint! Preparing for a deathblow it lunges directly at Felrein who was collapsed by the wall. Barely able to focus through blurred vision and agonizing pain the blacksmith's apprentice narrowly rolls aside only being nicked by the spearmint's point. Crawling desperately towards the open back door of the bakery, Felrein sought refuge. If he could find something to slow the fiendish dessert devil down then there may be a way out of this mess. Once inside he used the leg of a nearby table to pull himself up off of the floor. He leaned heavily against the tabletop since his ankle was shattered. Observation found some spare parchment for baking and what looked to be a mixing bowl filled with a sticky goop. Placing a finger to taste it Felrein concluded it was taffy! Pouring out the taffy onto the large parchment he manufactured a makeshift glue trap to stop the rouge gingerbread boy dead in its tracks! "Run, run as fast as you can. You can't escape me, I'm the Gingerbread Man! Muhaha!" sang the demon who appeared within the doorway.

Felrein's body tenses in fear at the gingerbread man glaring at him in the doorway, his heart beating so fast and loud that he thinks he can hear it. But, he watches carefully to see how the gingerbread reacts to his taffy trap laid out for him, cursing quietly to himself when the demon absorbs the sticky treat with its power through the small legs. Felrein screams as the demon blasts the taffy his way and pins him to the wall by his wrists and ankles, there's nothing he can do now, so, he hangs his head in defeat while closing his eyes. I guess he'll wait for his-wait? What is that sound? "Tiz I, Tiz I upon my regal steed-" no...it can't be, can it? "Felrein my friend at last you shall be free." "Prince Charming!" Felrein looks at his old friend in amazement that he's hear...he thought he went to slay an ogre or dragon or something? Oh, well, doesn't matter to him. What's important is the man standing behind the gingerbread demon flipping his hair...are those sparkles coming from him? (I really don't know where this stupid story is going? XD)

The man formally known as "Prince Charming" was infamous for parading around town as a self proclaimed hero. For most he was a nuisance and earned the reputation of "Village Idiot!" Not understanding the dire situation he'd stumbled upon the gingerbread demon quickly dispatched the fool with one slice of his peppermint claws. Cleaving the man's head from off his broad shoulders. Then taking Charming's lifeless head by the hair it chucked it with a sickening thud into Felrein's stomach knocking even more wind from him. Felrein was absolutely defeated now that is life was hanging by a thread of fate and taffy. "What a wacky way to go out...good grief!"