What Is Love

And humble lol. I know it will be a lifetime process for anyone really. There is always something new to learn about love.

I think most of what young folk associate with love is really lust. That aching need to be near someone constantly, the light flutters and sexual desire is all physical. Love itself forms slowly over time. You notice it when he finishes your sentences, knows what you want before you open your mouth, treats the relationship like an equal partnership with equal give and equal take, and when he chooses to stay with you despite the fact you're putting on a little weight, you occasionally get on his nerves and sex is no longer available on tap. You'll know it's true love in twenty-thirty years when you have three kids at college and he's still there.

@Ed - It's quite obvious that if your partner dies then they're no longer with you. That doesn't mean they didn't love you up until the point they died, and it doesn't mean you don't still love them. Obviously that's a sad thing to happen, but the longer you stay together the stronger your love becomes. My point is, if you've been together over a long period of time, raised a family, built a home, had the responsibility of children removed since they're grown, and you still want to be together, then you know that's love. The whole kids and family is just one example; you have to face hardships and challenges to test your relationship so that it can develop. For example, right now I don't have a job. Until now I've been the main source of income, done a lot of the home-making and (I think Sherflow would agree) I've been the main emotional support. Now the shoe is on the other foot - I can't provide, I'm not capable of being the main support because I need support myself, and Sherflow has been helping a lot more around the house because of it. Sometimes when things change like this in a relationship one of the two parties can't handle it, arguments happen and they break up. Love is pulling your shit together as a couple when it gets tough, again and again through the years. If you endure it's love. That's my opinion. The point about not being able to 'keep him with you' - the point of a relationship is that you shouldn't try to stay together, you should want to stay together, and yes, that means working at the relationship mutually, not one party putting in all the effort and then getting fed up with doing all the work.

All of your opinions are fantastic, thank you! However, some of them sound like friendship, so romantic relationship is more intimate?

Ideally, a romantic relationship is the closest friendship imaginable with sex. It also means you're responsible for each other though - living expenses, taking care of each other when you're sick or feeling down, if you have kids you share that responsibility too. So...best friends, with sex, whose lives are completely entwined on all levels.

If you endure, that's love. Divorce happens, but does that mean they never loved each other? Of course people who were in love can and do lose it, but that doesn't mean what they had was any less love than those who grow old together. Love, to me, can be summed up in one word, sacrifice. Normally, sacrifice is painful, but if you love someone, it's willingly done. Love is not something you can look at and say "They never were in love." or "They haven't dealt with life, what would they know?", it's something that can and should grow. Love is a want and desire to see someone grow strong, be safe, be happy and be cared for. In a relationship, any relationship, it should most importantly be a two way system.