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How to start a good conversation with a girl/guy

silverredwolf
I've been noticing this within my circle of friends and even outside of actually. People tend to have a hard time starting a conversation with someone they met/added through the internet. Now i know that's obvious but I wanted to start this topic so that we as a community can find good things to use as a conversation starter in hopes to help people just like me get some ideas when we run into such situations. As I'm quite inexperienced with this, hopefully a few of our experienced members can give some good advice. :)
infernalmonsoon
There really isn't any special secret to actually get a conversation started, it's really a matter of confidence and knowing how to respond and keeping a conversation going - of course both people have to work together on keeping a conversation going. Just say hello, start with some small talk and get to know the person and befriend one another - get used to the person and keep talking, eventually speaking to said person will become second nature and from there you'll know what to do and say and you'll have a good idea who that person is and how they'll react to a certain topic. There are some people out there who will seemingly ignore you or will put in little effort talking with you for seemingly no reason but that's just how some people are and those kinds of people aren't worth your time - hell there's a few people on here and IRL that won't even respond to me but have no problem talking to others despite me greeting them the same way as everyone else because of unknown, arbitrary reasons but that's alright because like me, you shouldn't ever dwell on those people, leave them alone and just move onto the next person you want to speak to because chances are, they will talk to you as well. Try from there and you'll eventually get a good result where you'll make some pretty good friends. It's really as simple as that, too many people overthink social situations - especially those who have trouble speaking to people but it's nowhere near as bad as a lot of people might think. I learned that 8 years ago when I was only 12 and once you have that mindset, you'll have no trouble speaking to anyone. It's all about taking things in stride in the end, just go with the flow.
buji
^ Basically what Monsoon said. A TLDR is at the bottom of this post. Some advice I can give though, don't always go for the generic, "Hey, how's it going?" to start things off, that'll usually get you nowhere for new people. A lot of people would want to avoid small talk, so if you're wanting to talk to someone, try to keep conversations interesting or unique. Other things you can do, even if it seems stalkerish, is find out a bit more about the person you want to talk with, if on here, check out their bio if they have one or kinda see what they like to post around on the forum, if they have at all. If they're new (and especially a female), don't do the "hey, how's it going" thing I mentioned, since that'll make people think you're just talking to them because they're a female on a dating site. Since this is technically "an anime dating site," try talking about each other's interests in anime, but in details. So if it's like, Evangelion, don't just say like, "I like Evangelion." Explain why you like it. "Shinji is a little bitch, but I enjoy him because he reminds me of me" or something. Try not to use winky faces too much, they make anything sexual. "I'm going to go bowling with my friends." "I'm going to go bowling with my friends ;)" "Wanna play a game?" "Wanna play a game? ;)" "That man is on fire!" "That man is on fire! ;)" See? TLDR: Don't be boring. Be more confident without pushing yourself. And if you feel like talking to the person is a chore, regardless of how much you're interested in them, just move on
michaelw
#1 "blah blah blah blah blah blah" #2 "???" #1 "blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah TALKING POINT" #2 "TALKING POINT blah blah" #1 "blah blah ext." #2 "blah blah ext." That's about my understanding for how small talk is supposed to work. But I don't think I have it figured out.
be_mindful
Regardless of where you meet a person, I find that it is easiest to start a conversation with someone by asking them about a specific topic that is relevant to where you met them. Like if you met them at work try talking to them about their job. Ask them what they think of their current position and about what they like and dislike the most about working there. Or if you met them here on Maiotaku try breaking the ice by asking about their opinion of an anime that the you two have in common. Such as who is their favorite character or what drew them into a specific series or ask them for recommendations for anime that are similar to the one you two have in common...from there you can ask about other common otaku interest such as inquiring if they play video games and if so what titles do they enjoy. I personally have found that in most cases people love to talk about themselves and they also enjoy being able to help others thus I try to take advantage of this to start conversations. I find that by simply asking someone for their opinion on something or for help that it helps break the ice in a less awkward way regardless of whatever topic I use to start a conversation.
shadowdemonx9
Hello there, I really like your shoes (other things that make her stand out) *Insert the rest of the awkward conversation here*
rainx
It's not very easy to strike up a conversation with random strangers, especially cold turkey with no in line or topic to start it off. Its not made any easier by the "why is this random guy talking to me? stop talking to me you creepy stalker!" mentality a lot of people have. My experience is if you smile at them and say hi and they reciprocate, then at worst you may have an in road to begin a conversation. It also helps when you have an intermediary like a friend of a friend to introduce or bridge the strangers gap.
verflucht
I usually just say 'Hello', if they reply, return a compliment, if you noticing anything striking about them, like something that might give away hobby or interest, begin to talk about that.
veray_dere
Me: Hi... Her: Hi! Me:..........K bye! ;-; lol
tsuneharu
I usually break the ice with something casual like "ayy bebi u want sum fuk?"
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