PV of my web comic INEVITABLE WORLD SHIFT

I would like to share PV(done as a personal project) of my web comic INEVITABLE WORLD SHIFT Any your comments and critiques would be appreciated.Thank you :) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dgGyCJ165X0 My Youtube channel https://www.youtube.com/user/MinaseSouya?sub_confirmation=1 :same video on Vimeo http://vimeo.com/108034862 :same video on NiconicoDouga http://www.nicovideo.jp/watch/sm24615756 :same video on my HP http://minase-souya.sakura.ne.jp/InevitableWorldShift_PV1.html This animated film is made as PV of my web comic. Link to 100 pages comic released on my HP. http://minase-souya.sakura.ne.jp/2dcg/comic_UB_ep001_ver200_jp_htmlVer/comic_UB_ep001_ver200_jp_htmlVer_p001.html "CGtracking",which is one of most popular website cgi related artists in Japan checks daily, picked up the PV for the 2014 Nov 10's article. http://cgtracking.net/archives/29526 ScreenShots [IMG]http://38.media.tumblr.com/47ccb3b633be8098bccfc7c867d0d13b/tumblr_ndoflnypX81u1akiao1_500.gif[/IMG] [IMG]http://cgtracking.net/wp-content/uploads/2014/11/141109_minase_souya_4.jpg[/IMG] [IMG]http://cgtracking.net/wp-content/uploads/2014/11/141109_minase_souya_2.jpg[/IMG] [IMG]http://cgtracking.net/wp-content/uploads/2014/11/141109_minase_souya_1.jpg[/IMG] [IMG]http://cgtracking.net/wp-content/uploads/2014/11/141109_minase_souya_3.jpg[/IMG] ミナセ宗谷「イネヴィタブル・ワールドシフト」

Oh wow! Impressive. I see you're a professional. Kinda makes the rest of us pale in comparison... You want complaints? Critics? What the hell are you talking about?? It's PERFECT! Well the art anyways. Can't say much for the story as I'm still on my way to learning katanaka, but at a first glance, you've got something pretty epic going. I feel like I owe you my respects.

Alright so I can't read Japanese, but I looked through most of the comic searching for art flaws. Here is a small list that I think are things you can work on. As a disclaimer to any on lookers- the artist is at a proish level, however is missing a few things to be really great. 1. As an artist you're good at poses and figures you rarely have any mistakes. However your panels do not have a visual flow. Movements are rarely motivated, scale is usually difficult to ascertain. Which means composition wise you're very weak. 2. Panels lack depth. When doing a full shot you tend to go for just regular horizontal views. It would be much more intriguing though to make the vanishing lines diagonal and add a larger variation between foreground and background elements. 3. To many backgrounds. You have a background every panel. It kills the flow and speed and makes everything too structured. 4. Speed. Your art does not articulate speed or awe inspiring movement at all, and I'll tell you why. Your art style lacks variation. Without speed lines, insane foreshading, and purposely dodgy or different pen techniques you can't do this. Coloring your manga gives you even more of a disadvantage. 5. Character designs. They aren't great, some are fine, but the biggest thing is the designs lack a contingency. Many of these characters do not feel like they should be from the same manga. 6. 3D-the use of 3d in panels is insanely jarring. Takes me right out of the story, either that or some backgrounds are to realistic. 7. Your sci-fi elements just need work. Final personal suggestion-id move to black and white with screen tones. I think it'd look better. Currently it feels to much like anime screenshots just pasted.plus all the saved coloring time will let you make better compositions and linework. Bam.

I guess character designs are one thing, but don't see a problem with it being a full color. I think it gives personality to the whole thing. It has it's disadvantages alright, but it's not a reason to scrap it altogether. I think it's commendable that he decide to it his way instead of following the crowd...

It's not as if drawing black and white is following a crowd. There's good reasons mangas are done black and white and other than money it's really all on translating raw emotion on the art side. never did I say he HAD to change from being in color, that's why I put it in a different section entirely. All I saw was that the color is making his-as in this can be unique to his art- comic look like still frames and not a comic.

Amazing work overall! Here are a few things that I feel should be addressed to make it even better. There should be more motion blur in the action panels. Backgrounds should be blurred a bit so that you know what to focus your eyes on. In the screenshot with the tank, her legs are awkwardly long. Personally, I love the colors in the animation. If you decide to take the time and do it, all the more power to you. It separates you from other artists who hate coloring. Maybe you can experiment with color tones to make foreground objects stand out from the background more. It was a pleasure to see. Looking forward to any future edits you have.

I think it's beautiful and perfect the way it is - Not all artists think the same.

An artist needs criticism to get better and realize their faults. Dalton is doing just that. Hes even going as far as explaining why. Nothing in life is perfect bro, if you dont know that you're going to have a tough time ;D