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church problems

kakashe
Mar 16, 14 at 1:16pm
ok so im going to a new church or i was and my dad wanted to go so he went with me and all my friends go there and apparently he said he thinks its a dumb church and they dont talk about god and he wont let me go there cause he doesnt believe in what they preach cause he believes the total apposite im so damn pissed right now i want to say f*** you dad in his face but hed kill me what should i do and dont tell me get over it.
missallyesterday
Explain what appeals to you about the church, also remind him that they worship the same God, but don't go on the offensive, and speak to him in a level-headed civil manner. He may listen and give it a chance, but don't expect it as he's already made his case about the matter. Also, if he doesn't hear you out, or still says "No." don't be too disappointed. Adults tend to be more stubborn. Don't go on the offensive, cause if he's already made up his mind it will just cause more problems than you really need. I hope it helps.
toe
toe @toe commented on church problems
Mar 16, 14 at 4:35pm
^She pretty much summed up the best way to go about this situation. Everyone is obviously entitled to their own beliefs including you and him so even though you two may not share the same opinion on the church you should still respect what he has to say. But, it's like missall said just try to talk to him in a civil manner and explain to your dad that you liked the church and you have people you care about there. Do not make it a dispute and get overly upset or angry because that will never resolve a problem. Be calm and mature about it and if things don't go your way don't let it get to you. Being young can be tough sometimes because you don't have full control over some things yet. So even if things go wrong think of it like this; by being mature about the situation and not showing how upset or angry you are then you're dad may see how well you handle these situations and may even eventually let you go to this church on your own.
kakashe
Mar 16, 14 at 5:17pm
my dad is calvanist and they are arminian he said we should go to a church of are own faith like calvanilst believe god before the beginning of time new you would be saved armineist believe you can loose your your salvation if you do wrong and dont try to live a holy life. he also called me selfish cause i refuse to go to any other church and not his i told him no your being selfish bye not letting me go to church because you dont like what they teach. so were both not talking to eachother he will likely force me to go to his should rebell and lock myself in my room for the hole time.and yes i sound childish but my anger is takeing my reason skills and throwing them away
kakashe
Mar 16, 14 at 6:03pm
hey missallyesterday its kinda scary how much you look like my mom i mean you look 100% the same
toe
toe @toe commented on church problems
Mar 16, 14 at 9:30pm
By being angry and further lashing out you're only making the situation harder on yourself. Go to your dad's church together, although you may not enjoy it at least it'll show that you do care about him and respect his beliefs as well. Just be mature about the situation and who knows maybe you'll enjoy going to church with him even though it isn't the one you want to go to. You're a good person, just don't let your emotions get to you and be rational. You're profile says you're 17 now; once you're 18 you will have the opportunity to do many great things and have your life in your hands, to do what you want, to believe what you want, and be who you want. You might have to wait a bit, but just be strong and you'll handle this fine. Just don't try to make things harder on yourself by acting out and letting yourself be angry about this.
kakashe
Mar 16, 14 at 9:40pm
ya i guess i came to a agreement with him ill go to his church on sunday and on wensdays ill go to mine so i can hang with my friends
haruu
Mar 16, 14 at 9:42pm
Ahah, funny enough I've been in this situation. What I can say from my experience is that it's never good to lash out and act against your parents. In the end all they ever really want is for their kid to be safe and live a good life. Now what they consider as a good life is a completely different issue. Just know first that they have your well-being in mind. Try sitting down and telling them calmly what your thoughts on this matter is? If you truly believe in your religion, then waiting a few years until you're independent won't kill you. You have the rest of your life to believe in your religion. Plus, your religion is something you believe in. Thoughts of it can't be taken away. I'd only ever see this as a problem if your parents would go all hardcore mean on you when you're an adult and they try to give you an ultimatum. Although by then, you'd both be grown adults and you'd have a better stand than right now. I hope you'll be alright and that things will work out for you. I hope that this issue doesn't consume you too much. Best of wishes~
kakashe
Mar 16, 14 at 10:07pm
thank you
missallyesterday
You must have a pretty, well dressed mom then... Though I'm not sure that's a compliment.
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