Kinda new here. What’s up everybody. Thanks for add!!!
*although the memories of when exactly I had made those choices are unclear, I knew that I always walked in the rain to separate myself from everyone else*.
That's a bit complicated, so I'll try to condense this as much as possible. I've made a video about this on my youtube channel, but I don't want to subject anyone to 30+ minutes of my rambling lol. How to put this.... Well, all of us have had a moment in our lives when we began making choices for ourselves. When I was around 14 years old, I spent a lot of time circling my apartment complex while it was raining. During that period of time, I was going through some changes so to speak. For most of my life up until that time, I never really made my own decisions. They were made for me, with or without my consent. I also didn't think much of myself until then either. It was as if I was sleeping the entire time, not really aware of who I was. Essentially, I wasn't much of a person. That changed when I began making my own choices, like weening myself off of a drug that made me feel like a zombie. Afterwards, I started taking more steps to establish control over my own life. Years later when I reflected back on those days, I remember walking out on those dark nights trying to figure out who I was. It had become almost routine for me to walk around my complex while it was raining. Although my memories of when exactly I had the choices were unclear, I always walked in the rain to separate myself from everyone else. I wanted to be alone so I could think about things without any external distractions. Later on I realized that I was beginning to think in ways that I hadn't before and that I felt like I had gained control over my own fate. Decisions oftheRain sounds like a lame name, so I chose Judgment oftheRain as my existential name and I use it to this day on this site and others. Hope that doesn't weird you out too much, but that's where it comes from.
Ever seen Yu Yu Hakusho?