That's better and yes, you are right. I've always been taught to do onto others as I would want them to do onto me. That good things come to those who DO good things, but being nice is not a weakness, it's a gift, that deserves appreciation. Despite what others may think or use against it to take advantage, some things are more important than looking out for ONLY yourself. This is not my routine, this is who I am, whether you like it or not I will always be like this, no matter what the cost or the hardship. Because I believe in spreading good will and hope to others regardless of my limitations. Yeah, I waisted my time going down there to try and please the unpleasable, but I proved to myself and those around me, I am a man of my word. That I ALWAYS keep my promises and that's more than anyone's ever done for me. So in a way, the gamble you think I lost, I gained victory in something even better. Self worth, courage, honesty, charity and loyalty, regardless of how everything turned out. Maybe I am just a poor, worthless slave to a bunch of deranged psychopaths, but to the victims who have been oppressed unjustly by the tyrants who hurt them before, I am a hero in the arts of literature. I'm more than just an author, I am a positive philosopher and therapist. I didn't have to help the likes of my ex's kind, if I only looked out for myself I would've let her drown in her family's misery and as a hero, it pains me to see other's suffer. Perhaps the fault IS mine, I took her for a victim who needed my protection and she turned out to be just another villain. The only thing that she did to hurt me is why it happened so suddenly. Everything seemed to be going as we planned, I found work just like I promised I would, but apparently I missed something. I guess she didn't expect me to be so successful in my honor and detication to her love for me, either that, or she was counting on me to fail, by my own hands or not, but you're right, it SHOULD get better. I did what I had to do and I had no trouble keeping my promise, SHE was the one who changed her mind and decided she didn't love me anymore. Can at least anyone understand, under those circumstances WHY someone would want to kill themselves. I gave that woman EVERYTHING she ever asked for, but when the time came to seal the deal, she got cold feet and took it out on me like I was being TOO nice. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! SHE asked for all those things. It's just like that outrageous episode of Divorce Court. A woman wants to seperate from her husband and I qoute: "Because he was too nice." You know what happened to her? She became the laughing stock of that entire courtroom, even the judge was flabbergasted with hylarious surprise. She looked at that poor confused woman as if to say: "Girl is you crazy?! So basically you're telling me, you have a man, this man right here, who would do ANYTHING for you, treat you like the QUEEN you WANT to be and you're divorcing him because you say: "He's too NICE?! NICE?!" Funny, last I checked that was the definition of UNGRATEFUL. Cause when you give someone you love with all your heart everything they could possibly ask for and they put you down before they say thank you. EVERYBODY wonders where they went wrong, I know I did, I still can't figure out why doing what I had to do would just get me into trouble and not the gratitude it deserves. Ya know what I mean? But thank you none the less for the positive support. That sounded much better and thank you again.

it going to be soon good anime this year ^^

Yes, it might have elements of trolling, be it's also pretty real in how it presents things. However, in my opinion, the line not to be crossed is stuff like deluding yourself into thinking anime is "real" and forgetting oneself into this imaginary world. I call myself an otaku, and I'm proud of it despite all the bad rep it gets; but it's true that even I find some particular extremists (if you will) disturbing. The problem is that for non-otaku people, we ALL are like those and that's why it's viewed badly. But then again, this sort of things happen in a lot of other things as well, so I don't really mind.

Being an "average Introvert socially awkward university student" doesn't make you a reject dummy :P Half of us in here are exactly the same as you, myself included! So welcome home, comrade!