so I'm on a dating site

Mizzmay, there are plenty of attractive muslim girls. You DO KNOW why they HAVE to cover every part of their body but their eyes right? It's all religious based and they are to not stop doing that until it's a subject that they feel they should show themselves to. Boyfriend/Husband/Someone they like. Other than that, they follow the rules of their religion just like most religious people do. That enough is probably attractive to Muslim guys because it's just a cultural thing.

Honey, look at me. I'm older, I'm heavyset, I'm STILL rocking what I've got! You have to take the great leap and put yourself out there, or you will be the ignored little wallflower. Is it easy? No. Is it worth it? YES.

There's also the issue of legitimacy. On the Internet, anyone can claim to be anyone or anything. And people do create profiles on dating sites for the sole purpose of trolling and lulz. Sure, there's nothing stopping them from stealing some random person's picture and claiming to be them, but having a picture still goes a long way towards making a person seem more "real" and makes it more likely that someone will take the risk or expend the effort of reaching out to you. The problem Mizzmay is running into is that she is an idealist. And there is nothing wrong with that; it's admirable. But idealists tend to see issues like this in prescriptive terms (how they *ought* to be) rather than descriptive (how they actually are), and that makes it hard to adapt to a situation that is resistant to change.

And maybe it's just none of your damn business what I look like until I say otherwise. I've been burned too many times to put my photos up. One time a long distance bf said 'hey do a bikin pic!' and I trusted him so I did. Guess where that ended up? 4chan. I do have stalkers both online and in real life, not because I'm pretty or anything but because I tend to make friends with the wrong crowds. There's also the issue of family members finding my pics online which would cause a huge uproar and probably get me disowned even if it was just an innocent face shot. Besides even if I did have a pic up would anyone actually talk? Probably not. Sure looks are important for finding a date I won't deny that. All I'm saying is I want to feel at least a little comfortable with that person before letting them know what I look like. And that isn't unreasonable at all especially online.

Maybe it is none of anyone's damn business what you look like. It's an entirely reasonable opinion to have. I'm just pointing out that your ideals are in conflict with the way online dating sites work in practice. You opened this thread wondering why people don't message you. The lack of a picture is probably a big part of why. You don't have to compromise your principles; if you are comfortable making the tradeoff that you'll get a lot less attention by not having a pic in your profile, that's your prerogative. Just understand that you *are* making a sacrifice for your principles and that it bears directly on the question you asked in the first post.

Not putting all your cards on the table limits your options. But that's your choice to do so. Risks and rewards, right? (pretty much what everyone else said, but still.)

Right. It doesn't mean a damn thing what I look like. If you don't like me, you don't like me and that's all there is to it. People need to take it for what it is, a dating site is just a chance to meet people, this one is a bit different since you can make friends too. But assume it to be like a blind date you don't know if the pictures I have are what I look like in real life and I don't know if you look the way you do in your pics so it's stupid to judge based on pics.

Mizzmay, the point of showing a photo of yourself is so that those guys that you dislike WON'T give you false hope. What I mean by that is... A guy is only talking to you because you don't have a photo up. Once he sees how you look like, what if he doesn't like it and then decides to just immediately cut ties with you? Isn't that bothersome? Wouldn't you rather that type of people STAY away from you from the get-go by having a picture of yourself uploaded?