Stens Thoughts

I wonder if my mom thinks i dont like her... since i dont go to her place very often because for some dumb reason whenever i am supposed to go there i get sick >:c i was supposed to go there this friday but i got sick :c and it just feels like i am letting her down by not going, meh im gonna go there next week

ah it would seem that i have stolen your role james... sorry sorry sorry i am truly sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry :c

someone said that fighting depression is rewarding... i just feel worse and worse every. single. fucking. day. but i am still refusing professional help. idk why :c i havent even told my parents about it because i dont want to make them feel bad. :c and i am too shy to get help at school, i have told one friend about it and he said to get help and that helped him but i am too shy xD and i feel weak whenever i think of getting help because i want to "fight it" alone...

You know what would truly make your parents feel bad? Not knowing. A caring parent WANTS to help their child BECAUSE they love them.

sten. don't change. it takes a lot of effort to change, and in the end you're leaving a piece of yourself behind you, and becoming more "normal". wanna be normal? ok. but i did that, and it wasn't worth it. don't change.

i now know why i am feeling like i am. i am lonely and that just makes me depressed and then that loneliness gets emphasized into more loneliness and sadness thus i feel worse

my teacher gave us a test today... on stuff that we learnt during that lesson. we learnt stuff for 2 hours and then did a test and that test was basically alot of stuff we learnt earlier last year so no one remembered the stuff that we were supposed to know + the stuff we were learning for the first time :I

I cannot find anyone to love me apparently, no one seems interested in me. is it because i am looking in the wrong places? am i too direct? or am i just weird altogether :c