what are you doing right now?

@jenze_ojiisan, you should not be so angry at yourself for feeling. You are human after all. You will get mad, jealous, make mistakes, hurt others, etc. It's how you deal with your problems and the aftermath that counts. Do not suppress your feelings, it's only going to be more trouble for you later on. Try to express/calm yourself in other ways too, like musically or doing a sport, painting, etc. Repetitive work is not that bad. I would just like to have something fun that I do for myself on the side. I might take up a martial art or maybe painting or just something that could be productive. @Joaquin Stick, thank you! Do you know where I could read her works online? Or what I should start with?

@katse , i walk when im angry and need to calm down xD ... according to pokemon go that would be about 6500km in a span of 20 months ... but yeah i do bottle up most of the time , i just don't like to bother people with it i mean everyone got's problems but most of the time i just try to forget them and let them go

@jenze, i will sound like a broken record, but have you tried therapy? Also, preparing to sleep rn. I really do not wanna, but I know I will suffer tomorrow. Not to mention 9 hours of work isn't easy. Sigh. Only need to stretch for a bit and then I will force myself into an extra mini coma.

Waiting for my second bus. sigh My hands are gonna fall off by the time I get home (I am already thinking of getting home to sleep, since I only got 3 hours and a half of it). @blackheart, highfive lets die together on this amazing day

@katse i've had therapie for over 5 years for various problems , but it never felt like it was helping ... I know i shouldn't be so hard on myself all the time , but i guess thats how i was raised ... :s We always took care of everything ourselfs , you know . Dont count on people to help you ... its nice if they do ,but dont count on it kind of way . I kind of want to go back to therapie , but its hard to find the time lately , work has been so busy and my hours are kinda fucked if i need to go someplace after ... but i'l figure out something ... i always have so ... xD