Parents

Maybe there is a topic like this already, but I want to know. I'm an otaku, or so I call myself to be one. I'm an indoor person, antisocial, and I lack motivation. My mother, she sometimes brings this topic " when did you change so much, you weren't like this" and she is right I as a child was so damn annoying ( meaning I talk too much, ask to many cautions, I was courious of life) but then for some reason I began to keep to myself. When she's like that, it hurts...I blame myself for not been the daughter she wanted, which I think ( pretty, smart, well someone who likes to go out shopping and doing all those mother and daughter bonding) Also since I like anime so much, on those type of conversation, she also saids " I'm going to take you to see a therapist is not normal for a girl your age to be like this" Since I don't have a boyfriend she asks " are you lesbian?" and to close people she saids "maybe she end up like one of my niece" ( one of my cousin is lesbian) To some I respond " I don't know" to others I just keep silent. She's a great mom, she raised us well. I love her. But it does hurt so much when she saids those things. How do you deal with it, with your parents?

It's not your fault for being who you are. Not everyone can be an extroverted social butterfly and she can't expect you to be that just because that fits better into her world view. You should definitely talk it over with her and put emphasis on what you are not alright with. Maybe also find activities that both of you enjoy? Due to the lack of bonding she probably lost touch with the person you are and therefore assumes things. She probably feels just as rejected as you do now. Communication is key.

True...as a kid, she always took me with her, I was her companion. I do hug her, kiss her, and that's all the time, I just feel like doing it. She does saids she loves me, she's proud of me, I guess since I'm not a troublemaker. The thing is I don't know how to star a serous conversation with her, more like my family has problems communicating with our true feelings.

Parents can be emotionally abusive. My parents and grandparents are, in different ways. My father acts like I'm such a disappointment when he kind of set me up for the issues I've had. My mother has a deep sense of entitlement from the world, even before my dad left her ( she was a terrible housewife and didn't want to have sex ). My grandparents unintentionally shame me. Go figure. None of them are terrible people. Terrible at dealing with me though, for sure.

Taking someone to a therapist because they like anime is pretty extreme. What makes being a fan of Japanese animation any weirder than something like.. I dunno stamp collecting? Assuming someone's gay for not being in a relationship is really insulting/close minded on a number of levels, not to mention down right stupid. People who are gay can be in relationships with other people who are gay, do they not even know what the word means? "Gay" certainly doesn't mean being single. What's so bad about being single anyway? I don't get any crap from my mom about being single because she knows full well how disgusting most of the women in this tweaker filled town have become. My dad used to bug me a bit about it, but now it seems he doesn't really care what I do with my life. Probably gave up on me a while ago lol.

Yeah parents can be a bit of an emotional handful sometimes - personally my parents have always been ok with me being into geeky stuff because they themselves are geeks also so they really understand why I enjoy these kind of things. Your hobbies are a part of who you are and you really can't help being who you are - maybe your mother is just having trouble seeing that. Although from my situations, all it took from my parent situations is a bit of bonding time. Talk it over with her, tell her what you're not ok with and focus on what's really important - her getting to know you for who YOU are, not who she wants you to be. A lot of good can come out of it, you get things cleared up with your mom and she can help you break out of your shell a bit. Speak to her as soon as you can about it to get these issues over and done with.