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"Legacy"

nero1209
Eyes spring open! That noise, why must it be there, if only I did something, anything, no for now there is silence. Yet another day of this life, must I leave knowing that she is in pain and nothing has or will be done to help nothing but lies, covered arms, and hidden tears, and knowing that all this is for me. Eyes wide open they never shut this night, for the thought of what to do makes sleep but a fleeting dream, that noise again! My knuckles turn white and go numb as the grip on the object of her salvation and his destruction becomes tighter, no for silence befalls the night once again. That noise, not this time, as I spring forward from hiding a demon of salvation, and though seldom shouts and screams echo they acquire no footing in my ears, for the only sensation felt is the warm sensation trickling down my shaking hands. Stepping back, I smile knowing she will be safe from here on, what? Her face it’s twisted in anger. Why? All this is for you. Why must I defend myself from her? Anyone but her, for it’s too late, that warm sensation again now it burns as if eating a whole trough my vary soul. Lights and sirens hang in the air like distant clouds, even the sensation of my hands being bound and words spoken by a man in blue seem as if they are a cold wind brushing across my body, only one thing is coherent, and that is a voice I have never heard and yet seems very familiar, it is as if it’s being spoken in some ancient and foreign language that only I can understand, oddly enough a sensation like fire flowing from my lungs takes hold of my body, it’s me, laughing historically, for in that sentence one word springs forth more than any other, That, That is Legacy my friend.
nero1209
I would like honest opinions if you don’t mind thanks :)
kyetge
Kyetge! @kyetge commented on "Legacy"
May 28, 12 at 2:05pm
It reminds me of Metallica's song, "Enter Sandman".
littlemiss
Jul 02, 12 at 3:17pm
Reminds me of Disturbed~ Hehe. I wonder whyy... I like 'her salvation and his destruction'. I find that whilst reading it the tension does build up in the piece.. I do find the beginning more poetic but as it gets towards the end I find it my story-like and recounting.. I think in the beginning it is more abrupt, sharper and you focus on it more but as the events progress everything slows down and the sentences drag out a bit more. Overall I really enjoy it. :) Bar one or two minor errors in the piece it is quite captivating.
mop
Mop @mop commented on "Legacy"
Jul 03, 12 at 6:43pm
Maybe my soul isn't deep enough, but this was a little too abstract and helter-skelter for me to follow. I think it has a lot of personal value to you that isn't explained or hinted at to the reader.
click_here_for_candy
I'm sorry, can you explain why it's titled Legacy? I couldn't catch that.
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