catching your partner fapping to pony porn

PFFFFFT ^After that I just realized... Fapping(Only guys can do it)... Title should have been 'masturbating'...

Duh... The term for women is jilling to jacking or schlicking to fapping. Schlick is more of a wet sound...sooo...yeah or shaving (Shick)...I don't know anymore... To much rum...or not enough ... Either way, imma solve my current situation. I was tired of my lady, we'd been together too long Like a worn out recording of a favorite song So while she lay there sleepin' I read the paper in bed And in the personal columns, there was this letter I read If you like piña coladas and getting caught in the rain If you're not into yoga, if you have half a brain If you like making love at midnight in the dunes of the cape Then I'm the love that you've looked for, write to me and escape I didn't think about my lady, I know that sounds kind of mean But me and my old lady had fallen into the same old dull routine So I wrote to the paper, took out a personal ad And though I'm nobody's poet, I thought it wasn't half bad Yes, I like piña coladas and getting caught in the rain I'm not much into health food, I am into champagne I've got to meet you by tomorrow noon and cut through all this red tape At a bar called O'Malley's where we'll plan our escape So I waited with high hopes and she walked in the place I knew her smile in an instant, I knew the curve of her face It was my own lovely lady and she said, "Aw, it's you." Then we laughed for a moment and I said, "I never knew." That you like piña coladas and gettin' caught in the rain And the feel of the ocean and the taste of champagne If you like making love at midnight in the dunes on the cape You're the lady I've looked for, come with me and escape If you like piña coladas and getting caught in the rain If you're not into yoga, if you have half a brain If you like making love at midnight in the dunes on the cape Then I'm the love that you've looked for, write to me and escape Yes I like piña coladas and getting caught in the rain I'm not much into health food, I am into champagne I've got to meet you by tomorrow noon and cut through all this red tape

I'd let him pleasure himself, and leave him alone unless he noticed me. If he noticed and stopped what he was doing right away and freaked out I'd tell him I'm sorry I walked in on him, and that it's okay to have sexual urges and pleasure himself. It's good practice, plus it makes a person more comfortable about sex, so it shouldn't be shunned or frowned upon. I guess I'd congratulate him for getting more in touch with his sexuality. If it involved certain other subject matter I'd be concerned, but generally a man enjoying some porn and masturbating is healthy.

If I caught them I'd just walk away unnoticed. Later I would mention it over dinner and make them feel really awkward and guilty so they have to apologize, probably by buying me things. xD That's the best way to do it >:D

I ain't sayin' she a gold digger... but she ain't messin' with no broke nigga..

lol Lily, that's cute;) I read part of a gay friend's gay horse bestiality erotic story. Rather entertaining, didn't have time to finish. Read a post in a forum about a guy going on at length about how horse pussy is so much better than human pussy. Was entertained reading stories on a zoophilia website about peoples romance with their pets and such. (Mostly about a girls sexual/romantic relationship with her dog starting when she was 14!) Also seen lots of videos back in the day...

Dog sex at 14? ...how ugly was she that she couldn't get any guy to do her O.o

^I've seen vids of some surprisingly attractive females having relations with animals. Some just prefer animals I guess. (dogs especially) Fewer interpersonal issues to deal with, no worry of pregnancy, and obey commands, lol. My first ex told me about a truth or dare game she played when she was like 14 and a friend knew about another friend who had anal relations with her dog and dared her to do it in front of everyone so she did.