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Bad at meeting people

zen94
Jul 12, 11 at 5:41pm
Over all i'm not good with comming out of my shell and being myself and going on the offensive when trying to meet new people as just friends or more. Most of my good friends had to drag me out of my shyness before rly opening up. Anyone also have this prob before and/or find ways to over come this ?
kronos
Jul 12, 11 at 8:38pm
Welcome to my world, Zen94! I, too, have a hard time approaching people, especially the opposite gender. I've been trying to figure out how to deal with it for years now. I've tried to converse, but I can't get beyond small talk :(
lost_my_music
I'm actually the same way too ^^' I don't like to talk to people, but I do it anyway. It's all about practice. I used to avoid conversations at all costs. My trick for keeping a conversation is to ask lots of questions about the other person instead of talking so much about myself. I guess one of the major things with making new friends is being completely okay with letting people see who you really are. I think of it this way: "if this person doesn't like me as I am, then they don't really have a place in my life."
otakutan
Jul 14, 11 at 12:23am
I'm definitely this way too, mainly just in person though, online is a totally different thing for me. I honestly like to come up with random ice breaker questions (I like to look up questions and write them down or something) and then get to know the person that way...and if, along the way, we have something in common, I go off with that for a bit then continue with my questions. Yea, it's hard...and honestly, I think being shy will always be a part of you. It's something that you can somewhat change, but can't change completely. But don't worry! Some people like shy people, and most of the time, shy people are great listeners, and people definitely love those!
keyrunners
Jul 14, 11 at 11:05am
there's no problem with having a wingman to bring you into the conversation. instead of thinking of it as a problem use it as a solution. i personally feel completely awkward around those i don't know (and it's kind of hard to hide that you feel awkward when a: it's written all over your face and b: you're the biggest person in the room. that is always my problem when meeting someone new (and this applies to everyone i meet not just people i'm attracted to) i make alot of my friends through connections with my other friends and i have no qualms about that. although i am starting to break out of my shell and getting to know people on my own through cosplay. *shrug*
zen94
Jul 14, 11 at 10:30pm
Now i just need to find people to try to "practice" on w/o being a creeper lol
messyjessy
It's hard at first but once you are around at least someone your comfortable with you'd be amazed at how easy it is. It takes a lot of confidence and self assurance that you can do it, even if you have to fake the confidence. Me on the other hand rarely have this problem unless i'm talking to someone I really like. But why not practicing with a friend, or having one around for support?
newcomerdc
I saw the topic and the only thing I can say is to talk to as many people as possible. Don't worry about whether or not you might embarrass yourself. Just go for it
thepandatyrant
Some of these old forums are pretty fun to look through...
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