leading people on

It's interesting that all the issues the guys are having with females are the same issues I have with guys. All I know is that I like honesty and avoid the mind games. As soon as things become trivial, I move on. As a person, I have so much passion to give to the right person that I feel like to waste time chasing someone who obviously isn't ready for what I have to offer, just is not worth it at all. We cannot completely help who we get drawn to and sometimes we fall for all that push and pull drama because well drama can be exciting and lead to more passion, but I think some basic principles apply. There needs to be that spark/connection/trust/admiration for each other. I feel like if that isn't there very clearly then it never will and all you will have is the mind games and the aggravation. I think in a way that comes off as being jaded or being a jerk... right? Like wow you are so cold! or take it easy- let's see where this goes. Sometimes you just have to go with your gut and not see where things go lol Run while you still can!!! lol But in all seriousness, If you start as one type of person and change when you get into a relationship... that person might understand the mind trip you just pulled. Maybe they were tipping you up just as you were them to find out the truth and they move on once their curiosities were satisfied @ Endless Knight

Interesting concept, although I know my problem was trying to do multi task too much. I knew what I was getting into and I had to manipulate the person to fix what was wrong with them. I knew that doing that would make me lose my chances at a relationship. I done it enough now to know that very well. Is the only way I could help them. But now I am simply tired of people that are a mess to begin with. More like I am taking a break. Is tiresome to do that and then being force to move on. You even have to manipulate yourself. It was necessary even though it sounds wrong. The people I dealt with had series deep issues. I am happy that I made a difference in their lives so I don't regret it and I have some memories to keep.

Well it sounds like you feel obligated as a person who probably is seeking help himself to do what he can to help others. It seems pretty hypocritical to say someone needed your help to be fixed when we all could use some fixes to someone....all depends on the one perceiving you. We can guide people, but we surely can't cure anyone of their personal conflicts, so I think it would be dangerous and unhealthy for you to continue playing this role. I think it is wise that you take a break and focus on building yourself. In the end you only have control over your own actions and thinking no matter how much manipulation you do. You might think it's for their own good, but who are you to judge really? Not hating on you btw, just giving my two cents for what it is worth. I value honesty too much to see positivity in manipulation as you are able to.

Your statements are valid except I didn't judge anyone. Nor did I need anyone one before meeting these girls. I simply let them share what their troubles were with me. They told me how they needed healing and how they wanted me around to help. Although is true one can only control ones actions. What one says and does can trigger reactions and changes in another person. That's what I mean by manipulating someone else. It may sound wrong but in the end it worked. You would have to experience the situation to understand. I would give you more details but it would mean revealing someone's secrets which I can't do.

to put this out there about your earlier comment @endlessknight, she doesn't want sex at least that's what she told me as I also don't want sex. Not meaning she doesn't want to be physical, as I have been single for months up until the point I met her and without a girlfriend my whole life I definitely want a physical relationship as much as a intellectual/ emotional one she being single only 4 years and me my whole life is which is something else that up set me is that I kind of feel she just picked someone closer to get the physical frustration out even if she didn't particularly like him more than me. It just makes me say to my self if I can hold out my whole life without a girlfriend can't you hold out a couple weeks for me to hold your hand and kiss you again, I guess not.

Eto, eto, not sure what to say about that one. Guess you are as forward and honest as me. Some girls can't handle guys like us. We move too fast and maybe that's what's going on. Not sure is also likely she has Mix feelings about the whole thing or feels bad about burdening you to have to drive out there. Is hard to say and not easy to tell. Worse of is harder to change a girl's mind about that. Don't think i got any ideas for that one. Tag for who ever wants to pitch in. XD

Mmm. This can be a complex subject when talking about "girls" to "women, and "boys" to "men". Leading people on huh. Well. When I was younger, I once led someone on without fully realizing that what I was doing. I was about 14 at the time though. Maturity not only comes from age, but life experiences. In that situation I thought I knew what I wanted, but as time went by with the particular person and things grew more serious, I began questioning the relationship, the future, and mainly myself; which in retrospect resulted in me backing down after offering my up most apologies after realizing the mistake I had made. Now, now as I've been through many experiences...too many in fact, I've come to a position in life where I only look for relationships with the intention of possibly settling down and having a family. It's always a good thing to make your intentions clear early on in the relationship, in a well mannered way that won't put pressure on the partner or make them uncomfortable. It does help prevent These situations, but there will always be those cold hearted people that will manipulate your emotions because they want to feel empowered, in control or just want to be downright frigged b**ch- excuse my language.(Censored for the young 8D)

I agree with everything she says. Most situations fit everything she says. In my case I never empowered my self I usually leave all the power with the other person. Is fun to see what people do with power they never had before. Of course I do set limits. Then again I never fit the common description of anything. I'm weird like that. This thread has been interesting.

Sorry for budding in. I thought it would be nice to see a females position on it. I've been strung along a number of times myself DX