Posting Messages For Gabe (@Gabriel_True) Until He Comes Back To The Land Of The Living

@gabriel_true Day 95: We ate rice, beans and chicken for dinner, it was really good! I actually enjoyed the really crunchy/flaky parts of the chicken skin, but it's because I enjoy eating crunchy/hard (not burnt) foods/snacks. - You Should See The Way I Eat Hard Candy: Ying

@gabriel_true Day 96: I slept in most the day...that's not good lol, I need to go to bed earlier again. - I Need To Be Stopped: Wei-Wei

@gabriel_true Day 97: ❤️

@gabriel_true Day 98: My eldest sister says that 1 AM is actually when it's the next morning, not 12...so no, I'm not late today and I didn't forget to leave you a message :3. I love you! - It Feels Great To NOT Be Late: Your Not Late Friend

@gabriel_true Day 99: We ran out of food again, isn't that exciting! I can't wait to see what my God provides next, because I know it'll be good. Other than that, nothing much has been going on lately, Gabby, just chillin'...though I have been finding myself playing a lot more games recently, but I guess having nothing to do does that to a woman XD. I don't play anything difficult, just cozy open world games, those management idle tycoon games, or dress up one's, because I don't think I could handle any video games that are serious/require too much work lol. I still prefer a good board/card game over an electronic one though. - I Hope You Are Having Fun With Games: Wei

@gabriel_true Day 100: Happy 100th day of posting, Gabby! Nothing much happened today, just watched over our grandma today because our dad had to go get a surgery done. But, I didn't get to watch her long because she woke up around the time our parents came home from the hospital XD, but, luckily I was able to get her out of bed, in the bathroom and dressed before our mom came home to have to worry about it herself. - I Hope You Are Doing Well: Ying-Ying

@gabriel_true Day 101: I'm tearing up in a closet rn, Gabby. I bet at this point you are wondering what the crap is up with me and this closet all the time lol, but I sit in here because it's getting cold in our room and the closet is warmer than out there. Anyways, I usually hate to talk about problems I'm having cause I feel really burdensome to others when I do it...but, as you aren't actively online, doing so is a bit easier. Me and my baby brothers Birthday is coming up soon, idk if you remember that it's March 1st, but there's the date for you–but, idk if I'm happy about it? It's not that I don't want to celebrate it...I really, reeeeally do, but there's a thing that God has instructed my sisters and I not to do right now that I can't explain in detail yet (if at all) that is not allowing me to celebrate how we traditionally do...and it's really hard for me. There's a plethora of other things that are making me feel really sad right now that isn't just that, and it's just irritating to me. I end up getting stressed out by myself because I know my self-doubt/hate is really a cycle and it's something I am trying to fight against, but I also feel like I'm not trying hard enough. I know that I need to surrender it to God, but I feel like I don't actually know how to surrender it wholly unto Him and it irritates me–I irritate me. God has promised me (individually), my sisters and my family so many great things, and yet I feel like I'm not truly worthy of such things. This process God is having my older sisters and I going through is extremely difficult at times cause I feel like it'd be easier of a journey without me, but, I know I shouldn't be thinking that way BECAUSE I know what He's said about us three being together for such a time as this. I've also been thinking about cutting my hair cause I feel like it's beauty is wasted on me. I don't take care of it properly, and it hurts me because I truly want to, but I never do it like I say, and so I start to tell myself God wasted His time on creating such long, curly hair for someone like me...which is really rude to Him because-to reiterate: I KNOW IT'S NOT TRUE. I really am tired of thinking this way...because in all honesty, I can't bring this mindset with me where God wants to take me, but I feel like I don't know how to properly give it away to Him. - I Love You, Gabby, and I'm Sorry For The Sad Post: Wei-Wei

@gabriel_true Day 102: I told my sisters through a very long letter how I've been feeling lately. I tend to have trouble saying my issues out loud, so I notice that when I feel too overwhelmed by life stuff, I end up writing to that person I want to talk to. I was scared waking up today...even though I knew they would never shame me for how I felt, if anything, I told myself that they probably wouldn't make a big fuss out of it (to not scare me away) but offer silent support/help – I was right. The first thing my twin did when seeing me after coming back downstairs was pull me into a very warm and tight hug. The only thing she mentioned about what I wrote down was that if I saw myself the way she sees me, then the letter would never exist in the first place, and then we started to cry together while our eldest sister silently watched us. I keep reminding myself how good God is despite these momentary struggles. Because, something that came to mind last night after I finished writing the letter was a prayer request I gave the LORD where I asked Him to help me be even closer with my family, and one of the ways I asked Him to do that was by helping me share my feelings with those in my family who genuinely care about them. And even though it's such a sad reason I'm finally able to be honest about these ugly thoughts I harbor towards myself...I am thankful for the strength God has given me to be able to ignore my doubts long enough to write everything I needed to say down, and of course I praise Him for the support system that He's given me through my sisters. - God's Love Never Fails, Even When We Do: Wei-Wei

@gabriel_true Day 103: I detangled my hair yesterday because my eldest sister was washing it today, and I felt guilty leaving the extremely tangled mess my hair was in up to her to do alone. My twin is the one that made me finally take care of myself and get in the shower, but our eldest sister handled washing my scalp (with her own hair products btw, and now my hair smells like pineapple) and doing the rest of the detangling. I was expecting her to just wash it for me, but she even trimmed it and then blow dried it after I got out of the shower – that's why the curls look especially pretty today! I truly thank God for my sisters, because they made sure I had a mini spa day. They even used a very fluffy towel to prop my head up on when she washed my hair in the sink. It felt very nice and I am grateful they love me very much. And when she finished, she told me that I'll always be beautiful. Today was a very good day. - I Hope God Blesses My Sisters With Something Special: Wei_Ying

@gabriel_true Day 104: I'm posting a message a bit earlier because the thought I'm having now might be forgotten later. Now, I am seeing through the love and care of my family and friends how much God sees me and loves me (I mean, I always have known...but when you are going through hard times, you sometimes forget or feel like you've been forgotten). For the sake of privacy, I'll be keeping this person's username private, but there was a very kind person on here who messaged me about wanting to send a care package to the house when they heard our family ran out of food. I wasn't going to accept at first because I felt bad doing so, but God permitted me to do so, so I listened and allowed them to do what they felt they wanted to do. I laughed immediately when this package arrived because I was expecting something smaller, but it was a huge box. A huge box filled with three boxes of snacks and the rest was legit food-food, which made me laugh again because I was talking to the LORD when me and this person were talking and I told God that if the contents of the package end up being food more than actual snacks, I would be even happier because I can give it over to the family for sustenance when we run out of food again. AND THEN, I started laughing some more when our mom and baby brother came home because our mom just told me that we ran out of food TODAY, and my package was supposed to arrive on the 30th of this month and another on February 1st. So God is just so intentional and doesn't delay in His goodness/provision. This lovely friend also sent me some vanilla cashmere lotion and liquid body wash. And what is even funnier (in a good way) is how I actually received a loofah recently and had no liquid body wash – but what truly pulls this whole thing together beautifully is the fact I had absolutely NO IDEA what this person was sending me...they didn't ask if there was anything I needed specifically or wanted, but they didn't need to, because God knew EXACTLY what I needed. Also, if the lovely person who sent me packages is reading this, thank you again so very, very much! My siblings enjoyed a few of the cookies you sent, and I'm going to enjoy my lotion, because I really love the scent of vanilla. - God Is Always Watching Over Me and You, Gabby: Ying