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Ask a female anime fan..

soulxevans
If I'm trying to ask a girl to hang out/ go on a date what ever you want to call it at a con or lets say in general but I don't know them like they are complete strangers whats a good way to say you're cute lets go out and get to know each other better without being so direct I guess? or how would I be a little more poetic, confident, less like I'm super shy, nervous and more like I know what I am doing and that she will say yes? how do you prefer to be asked out? how would you prefer to be asked out by someone you haven't met?
xueli
Dec 12, 12 at 8:09pm
I think for a lot of people it's an issue of learning body language. Going up to someone you don't know and chatting is not inherently creepy, it's when and how you do it that'll determine if you come off on a bad foot to someone. Location is something that you may not immediately think of but for example, going up to a woman in a park during the day commenting about weather immediately brings to mind less sinister intentions than if you were to try that at night. Things like crossed arms, hunched shoulder, being turned away from the flow of traffic are all signs that someone isn't really looking to converse with people. Also if they're reading/writing/drawing or just not paying attention to what's around her is another thing that'll generally tip you off. If her body language is more open, or if she takes breaks from what she's doing to look around the room, etc. then it's more appropriate to chime in with small talk.
xueli
Dec 12, 12 at 8:11pm
So if the location is good, she's browsing the manga section at barnes and nobel, and she doesn't look like she's in a hurry or particularly ignoring the world around her, you can go up. DON'T stare at her while you're collection your nerves. It doesn't seem like a big thing to you, but she'll realize that someone's looking at her and her mind won't immediate think, oh look that guy is trying to work up his nerves to talk to me. Generally women will think, wth that creep staring at me is creeping me out. Opening lines are not important. We don't remember the first sentence a guy ever said to us. Keep at a respectful distance, position your body so it doesn't look like you're about to corner her and just start talking. "Hi, sorry to bother you but I was wondering if that manga you're holding is any good. I'm trying to find new series, any recommendations?" stuff like that. An appropriate out if you think she isn't interested, you're not interested, or both, you can say something like oh, I have to go find my friends. It was nice to meet you. Smile and walk off. Also do that if it feels like the conversation is running out of steam, that way you can leave with an emotional high. Which if you ask for a number, you'll be more likely to get it.
xueli
Dec 12, 12 at 8:13pm
Don't stay long even if it seems like it's going well. "Listen, so I have that thing I have to do, but I'd really like to see you again. There's a cool anime night event at the local theater, would you be interested? I promise a good time and great conversation." You're more likely to get a number then. Also I would count that as a get to know each other preliminary get together. Not a date. If that works out though, you should then ask her on a date so it's understood by both parties what you're looking for. I'm not a fan of the theory that you can work yourself up from the friendzone because it seems 1) kinda dishonest as to why you wanted to be friends and 2) doesn't work like it does in movies. If she doesn't think of you like that, you just put her in a really bad place and created a whole lot of future heartache for yourself.
xueli
Dec 12, 12 at 8:14pm
If something goes wrong, like you feel like you were too creepy or you touched her too long or whatever, take a step back and apologize it. If they kinda blow you off right from the beginning (which isn't likely. we women are kinda socially programmed to be kinda afraid of hurting feelings), just brush it off and walk off with a smile. There's always other people
soulxevans
I appreciate the help and opinion.
quadroxzer0mega
A friend of mine who is scared to ask wonders about some girls' perspectives on men who feel uncomfortable around perverts (especially if they are making vulgar sex jokes constantly) and only appreciates nudity if it is artistic.
xueli
Jan 01, 13 at 4:48pm
Mmm, I think everyone has their own ideas about where the line is in terms of perverted jokes and what not. Personally I don't mind vulgar jokes depending on the context of which they're made. I think I'd be indifferent about men who were uncomfortable around perverts and appreciate artistic nudity since I don't really see those traits as a big deal.
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