Ever had a day....

where you tried to do something and improve but it ended up 2 steps forward three steps backwards? There are people who have far worse days, my heart goes to them. For my case in particular, I tried doing some home improvements but ended up getting so much dust all over the house. In the process I cut my toe and my thumb. I know I should not beat myself over it but god damn, I actually felt like killing myself. Calling for attention you say? No, although it may sound like it or close enough to that idea. Sigh, years of depression and this is a new low. How about you guys?

Can totally relate - I used to be super nihilistic and suicidal years and years ago but I got out of that stage and become really positive and upbeat - you're not gonna win all the time and there will be bad days, just more reason to take solace in having good friends and hobbies. I mean one person unfriended and blocked me on literally everything for simply wanting to reconnect after not chatting for a while and even considered commission her for art. So I just spent time with friends who actually give a shit about me, her loss and I'm a happier person without someone like that in my life.