The Bolder Thing to Do

I have habits of vanishing, especially when it comes to the internet. I'm horribly difficult to actually befriend, and if anyone wants anything more than that from me, well, let's just say I'm open, but I don't like interaction with screens. I do love talking to strangers though. Anyways, if anyone has advice (or is just interested in) my actual relationshits, I need help with this. Well, I have help, but I need to cope. Anyways, I'm in love with someone. Not attracted or enamored. There's a tiny rip in my heart for her. It's always been there. She's an artist, and I've watched her life crumble down and rebuild itself. Everyone she's loved has left her, and she can't do it anymore. Except, I've always loved her. Anyways, I told her this, and...she said she "1) Couldn't believe anyone would be capable of loving her. And 2) That I was far too important to leave. That if I left her, it would kill her." But what does that mean? Anyways, she avoids me now, or maybe it's in my mind, but is that not leaving? I do love her though.

Maybe because she feels like noone could love her she thinks if you were to expand on your relationship that you may not like her and leave? She's the only one who could really know but I think her avoidance of you is her way of protecting herself from being hurt. So I say challenge her and make it clear you aren't going anywhere.

Not to take things this way or that (meh...maybe a little) but, when you say "love", in what sense did you come across? I mean, that's a strong word but an even stronger action and some people are nervous of the word even if it's meant only in a platonic sense. The "it would kill her" part is more or less over dramatics but then that's just opinion on my part. What I mean is, she sounds like she has low self esteem and really just needs a true friend and is as most, just afraid to be alone. At this point all I can say is, stay strong and be true to your friend even if it means waiting for her to open up again. I'll bet you might have scared ( not in a bad way mind you...It's kind of intimidating to know someone cares that much.) her a bit, as I said, love is a very strong word but an even stronger action. I would just talk things over with her when the time is right.

Be there for her. Just keep being consistent. It's actually the easier thing to do for it is what is in your heart to do. 1) She feels that she isn't a lovable person so she is shocked that you do. 2) She feels that you are very special and irreplacable person in her life. Be there for her.

If you care, then you should be okay with whatever happens, so long as she's happy. She might be going through a transition state, or just feel like being alone. Either way, I wouldn't take offense if she is talking to you less as long as you two are still on good speaking terms. If she seems miserable, maybe you should offer to hang out more, or talk to her somehow. "Love" is a strong word. Use it carefully. There are many ways to show that you care about someone, and one of them is to be able to let them go. On an unrelated note, I misread the title as "The Boulder thing to do" and thought it would be about smoking marijuana. Sadly, I was mistaken.

Let us know how it turn out. I am interested. Only because I am one of those people who used such a strong word. She also couldn't believe that I loved her so. In our case I had no choice but to walk away from it all. She said she needed me but constantly reminded me of how she was depress over the guy that rejected her. I could no longer be her friend and I strongly believe that she needs to be alone to find her self. So even though she didn't want me leave. Her actions were pushing me away. Specially since she no longer took my feelings into considerations. That's what I believe people mean by someone mature. Someone that actually considers how you feel and doesn't trample all over you leading you on just cause they don't want to be alone.