Ever been in love?
Kensaku Toahiku @kensakutoahiku
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Ever been in love?
Kensaku Toahiku @kensakutoahiku
Alright, kitties. Sit down and listen to Papa weave you a tale of love, loss, and heartbreak.
I myself can claim I've loved twice. My first time begins with a girl I met in 06 on an old RP chat some of you may have heard of. The InuYasha Journey. It was a really popular RP Chat; right up there with RC (real chat), Inu.us, UG (underground), and various other chats.
We met Roleplaying one day on this Userplane Chat and didn't take to eachother much. We hardly even spoke, to be honest. We barely made contact that first year. It wasn't until some time after that we met again a year and a half later.
We roleplayed some more, reminisced and really grew close to one another. I can actually say she was, and still is, to this very day, my first best friend. We talked about a great many things: our countries, our people, culture, music, personal things (if you know what I mean).
Eventually, we started dating. We fell in love with eachother after sometime. The only thing that went wrong was me. I was still young at that time, I think 14-15. Hard to say. But due to my young age (she was older), I was insecure, inexperienced, and a little socially inept (I was a nerd/geek).
My own insecurities and hatred for things I couldn't change had made me into a horrible person. We were off and on here and there. But one day, we just stopped. We would go our own separate ways, not talking for months on end.
We still talk, but not without our home lives interfering with eachother. I eventually got a girlfriend (in real life, mind you) who wasn't comfortable with me talking to my old friend. She pulled me away and I would still try to be sneaky and talk to my first love, to no avail. We fell apart. We lost our love. After having known eachother for a number of years, and being eachothers other half, because we talked THAT much and knew EXACTLY how eachother was, to only let go at the end of the day and move on. Love that has not resurfaced since.
On the upside, this isn't the end of that particular relationship.
Moving on.
My second love, I've known for about 4-1/2 years now. We were together for.. 2-1/2 before conceiving a child. You read that right, onliners, I'm an actual father. Suck it. I'm an awesome dad.
It was after sometime in May, when I got medically discharged from the Military that we ended up splitting. And now we're probably gonna be going to court for joint custody over my son.
This story is special, because there were a lot of my "first times" involved in this relationship. It wasn't limited to just sex, but pure puppy love. The innocence we both had for one another still resides in my memory. I remember a lot of things that my ex doesn't remember, and is surprised I remember it at all.
The time we first met, the first time we reunited after being apart for four months and not having seen eachother. The day I made the mistake of cheating. The two weeks of hell I underwent when she made the mistake of getting in the wrong crowd (I'm a geek, I didn't drink at the time. I also don't do drugs). So the repercussions from her act have haunted me for years and I held onto my bitter hatred for a long, long time. But a few months after her getting back at me, yes getting back at me because she IS that kind of person, we had our son.
I was happy. I always wanted to be a dad. An awesome dad. A child I thought who could save our relationship! Unfortunately, it didn't work out that way at all. I went into a depression for the first two months my son was born. I only went to work and went back to my girlfriends house. I didn't see my relatives at all during those two months.
So needless to say, something was wrong.
Am I taking to long in this story? I think I am. I won't continue any further unless asked. But you got parts of my stories. Enjoy.
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