kutsuu

It's 0:41. I am drunk, drowning my sorrows. I remembered MaiOtaku and all the good memories with it. I checked my profile and it says I'm a 17-year-old loser. I'm 21 now. Was it really 4 years? Time sure flies. So much time passed and I'm still a loser. You know, I thought I would do something. Something to change my life. Do something to stop all the panic attacks I have every night. Do something about all the voices I hear during the day. Do something about all the sleepless nights. Do something so I don't feel like throwing up every day thanks to exhaustion. Just..... do something. But that's not the person I was back in the day. Nor is it the person I am now. I wasn't able to change. Well, there is one thing that changed. I'm now able to admit that I fucked up. I wasted it all. All the time, All the opportunities, and all the innocence I had when I was just a kid. I'm a young adult now. I have no future and I know it. , I don't know if the fact that I know I have no future is a good thing or not. Hope is a double-edged sword after all. Anyway, enough of all that self-pity. It's 1:24 now. Took me quite a while to put my feeling and thoughts into text. If anyone is reading this, I beg you, Don't be like me. You are better. You're not just a waste of space. Be the person I hoped I would be when I was a kid.