Did you learn from breakups?

That's also really true, I think deep down I knew that I never really liked this guy all that much and was only with him because he really liked me and all my friends had boyfriends. I think at the end of the day you need to be in tune with both the other person's feelings and your own. If you're not fully aware of your own feelings in a relationship you end up hurting yourself and the other person.

From my break ups, I've learned... 1. To trust my intuition. If my gut feeling tells me that she was cheating on me, then it's probably so 2. Long distance relationships don't work for me 3. Communicating mostly by text is a recipe for disaster. You can't discern tone and intent from reading a bunch of letters. Most of the communication is non-verbal 4. Being physically and emotionally vulnerable with someone I like is awesome! 5. I'm responsible for my happiness

If the breakup hurts, then it's a sign that what you had was probably deep. Of course, this is provided you are of relatively average mental stability and/or not a teenager. Also, tell your significant other you love them. First examine what "love" means to you. If it applies, then goddamnit, tell them! @Whitewolf: you sir, are wise.

I learned that "forever" doesn't necessarily mean forever. I learned that gradually growing apart from someone you've loved for years on end is like a slow death, and when it's gone, you mourn the loss like you would if a family member had passed away, but you eventually move on. I've learned that there's nothing you can do for a person who refuses to be open with you about their feelings. Eventually, all the resentment will bubble to the surface and there will be no repairing things. It sounds like common sense, but avoid people who won't be open and honest with you (specifically where it relates to problems they have with you). You can only blame yourself for so long before you have to recognize that the other person has to accept their share of the blame too. Nobody is ever 100% blameless. I also learned that it's therapeutic to blab on about this kind of stuff in the consequence-free environment of the internet... :P

@mochimartian HIGHLY unlikely. Teens simply lack the developed mind and life experience to truly appreciate the complexity of the emotions that come with romance. Often times, it is superficial, and if not, it is merely their very first foray into something serious. This experience would serve as the crude foundation onto which to build upon. There's nothing wrong with being a teen and being romantically involved. It has its own special quality; it tends to be easier and uncomplicated. But would I call it 'love'? No. @Shawnji strangers are the best to confide in sometimes ^^ Everyone is damaged to some extent, and it's nice to go to a place where no one knows your name every once in a while. No expectations or reprisals; only ears to listen.

Breakups are not necessarily a bad thing. I just got out of a nearly 2 year relationship about 2 months a go and I couldn't feel better! I certainly miss having someone beside me but I'd rather it be someone who accepts who I am and likes the things that I do. (Not to say they need to do everything I do, just tolerate it at the very least). It's more fun when couples can enjoy their hobbies together. So the lesson: Make sure the person you're with knows exactly who you are and you know exactly who they are. Or you may end up living a lie without either of you even knowing it.

I dated through school. I learned not to get involed with dating when your not emotionally involed. I wouldnt say they ended badly were all still friends but I just wasnt interested, really shouldnt date just to be dating.

I've learned not to shower your significant other with lots of gifts to try and help keep a long distance relationship (or any relationship) going. I was green, I was stupid (still am)and I thought doing all these nice things meant I was being a good boyfriend. Boy did I not realize how wrong I was at the time. Gifts are fine for say special occasions, and not many. No, it's more learning about each other and doing what you can to spend time with one another, growing and learning together. You don't have to do anything special for your significant other, just be there for each other and enjoy what you like about each other. Another thing I've learned is that I seem to just care too much. Again long distance, so when things get busy for us and we can't talk as often, it does kind of strain the relationship. So I ended up texting her just a bunch of stuff about my week if I hadn't heard from my significant other for that amount of time. Soon it became weekly reports with no replies. I'd leave messages when I could trying to let my other know that I'm wishing them luck, love them, etc. Looking back, it was suffocating for anyone in that position. But that's just what happens when you care too much. Emphasis on too much.

I think we all learn something from break ups to a greater or lesser extent. Over the years starting from around 14 years old, I've learned to be a lot more accepting of myself and my flaws even if other people won't, because being together with someone is also to love them not only for what's great about them but also for their flaws. When I first started dating, I did the stupid thing and tried to play myself up as the greatest partner ever but I fell flat on my arse because nobody's perfect. The more you try to hide a part of yourself, the more of a lie you become. And I sure as shit don't want that so I would want to be with someone who can love me for who I really am as a person, for my strengths and weaknesses.