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taylorhime

TaylorHime

Female
MO
jikokun
Taylor, I wold like to send you a private message about some things that are going on. I don't want to make them public, and you can share them with Lisa if you like, but I would like to tell you something to kind of explain where my head is at.. It's nothing to do with any of this, except for the fact why I've been so.. volatal (sp?). You can delete me afterwards, but I would just like to fill you in. It's not an excuse, just more of an explanation of sorts..
jikokun
Yes, too little, too late. story of my life. It doesn't make things better, no, but it's at least a start.
jikokun
Here, you want to know my story? I take Xanax, Lamictal, and Vibyrd daily. I take Adavan (sp?) when my anxiety gets out of control. I am clinically depressed, severe social anxiety, and OCD. I'm fucked up worse than you are, even though I don't believe you are. You're a good friend to Lisa and I respect that, and am thankful you are taking care of each other. I'm sorry I hurt you and lisa, I never wanted to, I swear. I just wish you could lower your shield and just listen.
jikokun
Look, I do also, ok? It was low, and quite honestly, I didn't know you did. I deleted the two posts.
jikokun
I DONT EVEN WANT TO MESS WITH YOU! You don't deserve it, but this is 4 months of... pent up aggravation boiling over that I wish you would have just talked about with me.
jikokun
Look, I'm sorry things didn't work out with Lisa and I, I am. I'm sorry you feel I lied to you, which I still don't believe I did, and If I did, please explain what I lied to you about. I still do care about BOTH of you, and I do want to talk about all this, but I need you to be able to listen to me and my side of things.
jikokun
Relationships don't always work, it's life, BUT I STILL CARED FOR HER. I wouldnt hurt her, and I still would have been there for her. But you had to go and spread lies, have her block me from EVERYTHING, and not eveven give me a chance, how the hell do you think I felt. Yeah, kind of REALLY pissed off, not at her though.
jikokun
I did care a great deal for her, I honestly did. And I did say I wouldnt hurt her. Then you both turned your backs on me, not even giving me a chance to explain.
jikokun
I did because it wasn't compatible, that's it. I cared about her as a person, but as a relationship, it just wasn't working. It wasn't personal, and yes, Lisa should come first, but I'm NOT a liar.
jikokun
You started this shot when you decided to claim I'm this huge and horrible liar to Lisa. Remember YOU started this.
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