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Was it my fault?

kawaiiballsacksan
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ericrulezz
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maikahontherts
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traplord
Jul 23, 15 at 5:41pm
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senseimewtwo12345
^^^ Hope you guys all enjoy your bans As someone who has dealt with depression, I can tell you that it is not your fault. People with depression tend to overreact to the little things. I can remember to a day where I was hating the world simply for looking at me. We all have bad days where small things set us off, but when it comes to depressed people, the slightest trigger can cause them to lash out, which isn't their fault, it's just another symptom of the condition. I would suggest, when dealing with someone who is suffering from depression, to just be the shoulder that they can lean on and let them talk about their problems, but it is probably far enough to show your empathy and leave it at that. Leave the real help for the professionals. And do encourage someone who is depressed to get professional help. I can tell you firsthand that it will not go away on its own.
shinobuamanohanatae
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rainx
Jul 23, 15 at 11:04pm
Honestly, it sounded like she just wanted a FWB kind of situation while you wanted a genuinely committed relationship, and that probably scared her off some. That's not your fault given you two were being intimate together and for most people, that's a sign of wanting a relationship. Nothing to me you said or did in your earlier times together sounded out of whack or the ordinary. Her being reclusive and not opening up to me strikes me as someone who has a lot of deep seeded emotional and social issues she needs to work out of before she's ready for something substantial with someone, and her getting aggravated with your over your compliments and intimate talk was just her being direct about not wanting anything more than FWB at most. For a lot of guys in similar shoes, they don't even get laid most of the time and just end up being the girls intellectual whore where as you at least got some intimacy out of it. At the end of the day, look at is as a sign that you dodged a bullet of potentially having to deal with someone who is clearly not ready to date right now. Strong feelings for her aside, there's zero point in attempting to pursue something more with someone who is clearly not ready for the kind of commitment you're looking for. It already sounds like you've turned a corner on that, which is good. Just don't push things any further than they are now. If she's honestly interested in pursuing something more serious with you down the road, she'll make the effort to seek you out.
graylorde
Jul 24, 15 at 1:10am
Cheers, it's quite a while ago now, and I think I'm pretty much over it. I've been seeing other people anyway. But there's been an update to the situation, guess you missed it since it was just at the page turn, so I'll post it here: So, we've finally gotten back in touch. It's been... 6 months I think? I don't really have any interest in getting back into all those problems, but it's feels good that there are no hard feelings anymore at least. However, there's been some developments that really worry me. While she was seeing me, she was gradually getting more confident about herself, started to go out a lot more and being social, trying to get a job and an education and really moving forward despite her anxiety issues. Apparently all of that has been thrown out the window since last we spoke, she's completely isolated herself, and is just indoors by herself all day playing games, she's not seeing anybody, she's not meeting friends, even just going to the store once made her sick. I feel sorry for her and I'm really worried about her health, mental or otherwise. It seems to have gotten so bad, I'm considering getting professional help, not that I'd have the authority to get anything done. Edit: Cheers, I guess you were referring to this after all. Yeah, I'll see what I can do to get help. I don't even know who to contact though. =\ What made me want a relationship despite what she told me, was how much she behaved like a girlfriend when we were together in person. She kept acting overly cute (laying down on my lap, making me involved in things important to her since childhood, talking together for hours throughout the night) and really wanting to be with me and seeking me out. While at the same time, she kept saying she didn't want anything by text. =\
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