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Being called a friend

adogx
Jan 05, 14 at 8:19pm
So over the last year, I've been looking for a girlfriend, but have had no luck. I tried the "get to know someone first thing" a lot. Yet every time I ask someone out whom I've grown to know well, I get this same answer each time; "You're a really nice guy, but I only see you as a friend. Any girl would be lucky to have you, and they'd be stupid not to realize that." I don't get it. For one they're contradicting themselves, and two, it's so annoying to hear. Any advice or opinions on this?
alexislynn
A lot of people have that problem, both girls and guys. A lot of times I find its because that person is already interested in someone else. That or they just aren't attracted to you which means they really could only be friends with you (but they don't want to cut down your ego because they genuinely like you). Anyways, don't worry about it too much. You'll find someone eventually :)
tthedragon
Jan 05, 14 at 8:55pm
Your not alone on this one. I receive the same kind of thing. If someone else was in my position, once they hear the phrase "Your really sweet, but.." They'd be walking out of there without a second thought knowing how it would end. There was another post about this somewhere in the forum, but I continue. From what I've seen, I believe if you want a relationship made, you have to establish your intentions to that certain someone. Quickly And escalate those feelings. Then ask them out. If she never felt that way, then it was of no use. Regardless, I love friendships. But other people tend to not talk to that person of interest afterwards. Such a waste. Another thing, sometimes...waiting patiently, and grounding a friendship deep in the ground for a relationship will waste your time. Flirting and stuff like that comes to you, you don't really go looking for it. As much as people claim that. Again, I'm speaking from observation since I'm out of the loop of relationships and such.(Not that I do it on purpose mind you) People just tell me, "JUST ASK HER OUT MAN." But I feel you have to establish a friendship first. I understand that. Even then, I don't meet girls' standards and whatnot. ~T
adogx
Jan 05, 14 at 9:25pm
thank you guys. I'll keep this to heart for next time :)
xueli
Jan 06, 14 at 3:11am
There's a lot of factors that are involved in romantic relationships and how we start them. Simply put for whatever reason, which can vary from physical to mental, they don't want to have a romantic relationship with you. It could be that they're not physically attracted to you or maybe they're not into something else like aspects of your lifestyle. But point is, there's a lot of reasons women will turn down guys that have nothing much to do with how nice a guy is, just the same as guys I'm sure have when they turn down women
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