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A Tricky Topic For Me...

oneman
Jan 12, 18 at 8:29pm
I suppose so. I just consider my own conscientiousness to be entirely different from other people, especially since the other aspects are correct anyways.
jtibbs
Well thats how you're supposed to be, you're different than everyone else. There is no copy paste personality, just likenesses. If you feel like you're lacking in something, then try to improve on it, or seek help from a professional.
oneman
Jan 12, 18 at 8:51pm
To be fair I already deal with a psychiatrist already. -_- This is me when I'm actually somewhat "stable".
yaasshat
You got answers and Midas basically reiterated and put just a touch more depth on what I said. I feel like you want people to agree with you/coddle you rather than actual opinions or answers. I'm sure you have issues, we all do. However, don't let those problems define you. Instead, strive for self improvement, always (I'm sure you are, I'm just making a point.). Besides, asking a bunch of random internet people a personal question, will always get you a thousand opinions. I'd just focus on getting to a point where you're stable (Emotional or otherwise) enough to depend on yourself first. Good luck. Who knows? Maybe you might get lucky here.
oneman
Jan 12, 18 at 9:11pm
Actually yaashat I want actual real answers. I'm not privvy to how women feel.Hence why I wanted some actual answers, not answers based on antiquated stereotypes. Also, I always put my best foot forward regardless. I don't believe in making excuses. I believe that I am the way I am due to emotional circumstances, and constantly work to overcome them. Yet I am entirely oblivious to how women think, and needed some insight.
jtibbs
Well heres hoping some women comment and give their 2cents on your thread.
oneman
Jan 12, 18 at 9:18pm
Same here Midas. Here's hoping we all find what we're looking for! ^_^
amrod
Jan 12, 18 at 10:38pm
I Cringed but then I read more and its only slightly cringy now. I feel like you're focusing too much on "woe is me" instead of living your life brah. The honest truth is that none of us know how women think. Women also dont know or cant comprehend how we think. Not to say that you actually feel this way but from what I read it kind of sounds like you feel like you're better than others. I might be wrong but thats not exactly an attractive feature. *Not bashing you by the way, its just what I got from the whole conversation. Point is, you have to get over it. So what if people betrayed you in the past. Suck it up and move on, if not you're just carrying that baggage around with you and any partner you find will have to be ready to pick up that heavy azz bag. EDIT: I hope you find the answers you are looking for bro <3
oneman
Jan 12, 18 at 10:53pm
@Amrod To be fair, while it may seem narcissistic to be so, I honestly do feel that way for a reason. However, I would definitely argue that it is less arrogance and more like confidence. One should feel insecure in their weaknesses and be confident in their strengths. There is a phrase: "Accentuate your positives, hide your negatives." I spent 10+ years studying and enhancing my own intelligence, while proving myself to be better. So why shouldn't I be as confident as I am? I would "suck it up and move on" if the evidence itself suggests I would need to. I also don't understand why I should pack it up and move on, when other people don't pack up and move on from the problems of their past. I find that inherently unequal, and I respect people enough to the point where there are tradeoffs. If I have emotional baggage, I am almost sure that no matter how much I've been through, there are always those who struggle with worse issues. So I see no reason why I'm the only one who has to change things here. If I have to change my views, then there's no point in the first place of trying to find someone. Especially since the woman would be lacking the qualities of forgiveness and acceptance, which does not appeal to me in the first place. I'm not making excuses. I'm giving both sides fair and equal respect and representation. Also, I don't see things as cringey, so I feel slightly annoyed that you called it as such. I do appreciate your honesty, and appreciate your good will. However, to call things cringey is a bit much no? Everyone is different, and everyone has problems. A truly good relationship in my view is that of two people working together to make their lives better despite things. There are just some emotional issues one cannot conquer on their own, no matter how strong they may be.
amrod
Jan 12, 18 at 11:03pm
There is not correct answer I guess, everyone goes through life thinking that they are doing things the right way. However I do see in your response there that you are focusing a whole lot on other people instead of on yourself. "Why should I change when others dont?" I mean come on, this is your life bro, why do you care what others are doing differently. My main point is that life is all about you and becoming the best you. I'm not saying that you wont find a girl who will help you through your problems or help out with the baggage. I'm saying Why are you waiting for one to come around when you can be mending these things yourself before hand. I feel like a person would have a much healthier relationship when they are 100% before the relationship instead of waiting to work on themselves once the relationship has started. I'm aware that I sound like an ass when I type and I'm sorry about that, its just the way that I come across so I hope you dont take it personally. I tend to go the harsh route instead of the sugar coating route because I feel like the sugar coat is mostly what you will get here. Now for the cringy part, you made me cringe again just now when you told me you spent 10 years enhancing your intelligence. It's okay to be confident but you sound big headed bro. Conceited maybe. Now I disagree you should not feel insecure with your weakness, you should accept it and fix it. Hiding stuff is just putting it away for it to resurface later. You should fix your problems. I don't know how you can do that, but you already took the first step and asked people out there and you also have a psych checking you out so you ARE doing something about it. I cant see my full chat box so I think I am typing like crap and drifting off of my main point, damnit. D:
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