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Losing Friends

rangerchives
Just a while ago, I was hanging out with a friend of mine, when he decided to lie to my face. I'm usually a forgiving type of person, put I don't think I can let this one pass. I've already cut all means of contact with him. But it really hurts, you know. I knew this guy since high school, and we usually get along.
neet_one
Dec 26, 14 at 9:08pm
lying is pretty common place and it's hard to find people that don't do it from time to time. The way you make it sound though it seems like it must have been something really serious. so I don't blame you for wanting to cut ties with him. Has the guy admitted to it or tried apologizing yet?
rangerchives
well, the thing is, I kinda cut off contact before he even had a chance to apologize. The only way he can contact me is through our mutual friend. And even if he did apologize, I doubt I will forgive him, or if I did, he would have to become an entirely different person.
neet_one
Dec 26, 14 at 9:27pm
That sounds pretty bad. Mind if I ask what he did?
rangerchives
Well, we were playing yugioh over skype, So I asked him, how any face-downs does he have. He replied with 5. Then when I ended my turn he stated he didn't have any. I know that may seem trivial to some, but to me it's a big deal. I find lying to be unacceptable, regardless of the circumstance.
neet_one
Dec 26, 14 at 10:04pm
I once had a friend that I knew for years who arrange for a double date with a girl he wanted me to meet. It was something I recall kinda looking forward, thought a lot about what I should do and say, got dressed up and cleaned up my car real nice. I even had to take a day off work for it. I get there and she's a no show and it turns out he just wanted me to drive him and his girlfriend around town for the day, even had me slipping him money so he could buy her stuff since he was penniless. This is a guy who would lie to me and steal from me a lot, but that was the straw that broke this camels back. I'm sorry, but yeah lying about a hand in an online card game just doesn't seem like something to get so worked up about. I might not really want to play cards with him again after that, but cutting off contact with them completely just for that seems a bit extreme.
yaasshat
Dec 26, 14 at 10:22pm
...Over cheating in a game? A game?!?! wow... In the grand scheme of things he couldn't of meant all that much to ya if that's all it took. No offense, but if that's how unforgiving you are with "friends", you may want to rethink pursuing any kind of relationship...shit gets real. And I'm an ass...
rangerchives
I don't think you guys see the issue here. If he lied to me about that, what's going to stop him from lying about other, more important things. That's the way I see things.
yaasshat
Dec 26, 14 at 11:48pm
Hence being able to forgive. I'll bet you were raised to believe in santa as many kids are, did you disown your parents because they lied too?
neet_one
Dec 26, 14 at 11:51pm
"If he lied to me about that, what's going to stop him from lying about other, more important things." I'd say common sense for one. Most people can tell the difference between a small white lie and something big and impotent. Honesty in a person isn't that black and white. Honesty is a great and noble trait, but you'd be hard pressed to fine someone who has never lied about at least some little thing in their life at one point, and that doesn't mean they should never be trusted again. lying is engraved into humanity and people do it it all the time. Sometimes honest people just can't help but make little white lies here and there and they might not even notice it. Most people know however not to lie about impotent things. It's one thing to tell your girlfriend she looks good when she doesn't, it's another to tell her you're running to the store for a minute when really you're going off to bang another woman. Most people can make that distinction, you should too.
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